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I move the hill to the bottom of the ocean. You flee. I'm a Zora, so I'm fine. In fact, the hill becomes a coral reef renowned for the ancient castle on top, and a Zora village soon springs up around it. I claim the coral reef.

WHEN!? WHEN DID YOU CHOP EVERYBODY INTO LITTLE BITS!? YOU CAN'T JUST SAY THAT YOU DID SOMETHING WHEN YOU DIDN'T! Ugh. I partially erase my memory so that I don't remember how utterly angry I am at Storm, and then, instead of removing him from existence again like I would have, I simply kick...

I kill Octo, thereby removing his possessive spirit from the hill and returning it to it's former glory. I then break up the FTNWO so that this thread will be much more interesting, and then I go back in time and cause Storm to never have existed. Then I leave.

The rules of rock paper scissors change, and you suddenly realize that with the game you just played, you are likely to be captured and tortured by the royal family for being in league with Ganon, so you flee the country and accidentally fall into a portal that leads 3000 years in the future and...

I become devoid of all creativity and you let me stay in your summer home to recuperate, and then we become great friends and we fortify it together and make it totally awesome. I share the hill

I sneak up invisible and dismantle the cannon using my highly advanced knowledge of mechanisms. I then disable all other technology and weapons possibly usable inside the fortress, and then I make you drink a potion that brings you over to my side. We claim the hill. (And then I reattach...

The goddesses look down (again) and notice that their beautiful Hyrule is now just a radioactive wasteland (again), and that it was all because of you (again). They rewind time to before there were so many alternate universes (which I believe is on page 24), and then they erase all of said...

The goddesses look down and notice that their beautiful Hyrule is now just a radioactive wasteland, and that it was all because of you. They curse you, making it so that you are unable to open or type in this thread or dictate to anyone to open or type into it for you by any means, and then they...

Okay that is just disturbing. You get banned from the website for overly disturbing content and therefore your claim is void.

Um. Okay, why have two people still not claimed the hill? (still mine)

After 7 years of sleeping in the spirit realm, I return as an adult wielding the master sword and take the hill back from all of you, and then I abolish all ratings on the hill so that anyone who wishes may claim it. And then I leave. With the hill still claimed.

AAAAAAAAAUUUUGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! I reset time and prevent the hill from being annihilated. I-am-link and I claim the hill.

I throw a squirrel at you. You are so confused that you drop it. The squirrel gets angry and starts chasing you far, far away. I-am-link and I claim the hill.

I politely ask if I can have the hill. You give it to me because you're a nice person. I-am-link and I have the hill. Thank you.

The goddesses get angry at Cell-shaded deku for polluting the enviroment, so they rain down from heaven to confront you. However, the fire that comes from their traveling through the atmosphere at such high speeds accidentally burns up everyone near the hill at the time. (except strangely...

I tell Zelway how to complete your order. Infuriated, you accidentally fall off a cliff. I-am-link and I claim the hill, just not publicly or within earshot of Babygoku.

That is so freakin' disturbing. I... yeah... The hill runs away because he's so terrified and I run away after him. Then we become best friends. I then go into the past and make post 929. Then I return to the present. I don't claim the hill because I don't want to die...

I go back in time and I keep I-am-link far away from you (the chicken nugget) while convincing Goomboo to eat you. He does so. I-am-link and I claim the three hills.

I replace your shotgun shells with water balloons and I turn you into a chicken nugget. Then i-am-link eats you. We claim all three hills.

You took the wrong hill. I kill you because you stole my best friend. I claim both hills.

Your scythe comes to life and kills you. I-am-link and I claim the hill.

I point out that you capitalized revives, banish, hill, bore and immediately launch into a long speech about the importance of using correct capitalization. You die of boredom. I-am-link and I claim the hill.

Link jumps out of your siggy and kills you for impersonating a Link, especially since you're the green one. I-am-link and I claim the hill.

I go farther into the past and legally leave the hill to myself. Then I become the first Princess Zelda 's childhood friend, and after we grow up, I hand her a letter to be opened years later before I leave to go on my next adventure. I then return to the present, which just so happens to be the...

I pretend to be goomboo and so (being stupid) you let me in. I then eliminate the lasers, regain my power from Bombchu (who is being held in your basement) and legally prove that my great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great...

I return I-am-link to normal after the player hits reset. I turn team four swords link into a matching set of furniture, and I turn goomboo and Bombchu into pillows. We claim the newly redecorated hill.

I switch everybody's mind (except those of the people on my team) with a kumquat's. We claim the hill and fire up our blender.

We're awesomer that you are. You die because we're so awesome. We claim the hill.

I switch your mind (which is in the hill) with a lemons. We claim the hill that thinks it's a lemon.

I regain my sight and you spontaneously fly into the sky, landing somewhere near Zora's domain. We claim the hill.

I transform you into a blade of grass. We claim the hill.

It already was. I remove your celebi magic and turn you into a chair. I snipe Technokid again, and I try to convince BabyGoku to switch to our side. Now it's ours.

I snipe Technokid with a bow and arrow. I don't have the hill, but I feel satisfied.

A herd of angry goats falls out of the sky and chases you off in the opposite direction of where Technokid is going. We claim the hill.

Our cats fight their way out of your stomach (without majorly injuring you, just making you pass out and get really sick) then they carry you to kakariko so you can heal. The horse fighters notice I-am-link and I are wearing several cultural symbols from their tribe, and accept us as one of...

I give you stupid and annoying answers until you shoot a portal at a satellite that redirects it to the other side of the earth, then you shoot one underneath yourself. I decide to team up with all my friends who were my friends before time rewound. We build a giant castle and summon an army of...

I play the song of time. Then I remove all thoughts of killing from your mind, and all things that could possibly cause you to accidentally kill anyone. I never lost the hill in the first place.

A hatch opens up in the ground directly beneath where you're standing. You fall in, then a cannon rises out of the hole, aims for Castle town, and shoots. I claim the hill for my friends.

I charm the hill so that, anytime you're standing on it or in any structure on top of it, you feel like something's tickling your feet. Scared, you run off, and the rest of your team, thinking you saw some hideous monster, run after you. I remove the tickling spell and me and my friends claim...

The player hits continue. I turn you all into inanimate objects. I-am-link and I claim the hill.

I infiltrate your team, turn Celeboy into a blade of grass and pose as blue link. Later, when we're all eating, I convince BabyGoku to leave the room, then I pull out a big bomb and throw it at the other two, then I blockade all the doors except one, leave the room, and blockade that one while...

*sigh* I throw a magic rope down that ties itself around you and babygoku. Happy now?

I heal us. I transport both myself and you three to the end of the world (literally) where one falls and will never ever land. ever. I then push you off. We claim the hill.

Your 3ds dies because it was infected with a fatal virus. You are also banned from every game store in the universe because scientists have discovered that the virus results from contact with your skin, and once something has been infected, the virus can transfer through the air to any...

Um... actually, Link is me... I am link... and I-am-link is link too... so... I guess that was an impostor or something? I don't really know... We still have the hill anyway... I'm confused...

We still have our castle on the hill, which we still live in, so technically, we've claimed it, while you have still officially claimed it, even though, without actually posting that we have claimed the hill, indirectly, we already have, by building the castle and by having claimed it in the...

I pull out a magic whistle and call a male demon wolf to the hill. You fall in love and the two of you leave the hill alone forever. We re-claim the hilll.

You both die for no reason. We claim the hill.

Your burgers catch on fire in your throat. You run to antarctica so you can put out the fire. We jump, and in the instant we are still in the air, rotate the earth 180 degrees so that when we land we will be directly on top of the hill. We claim the hill.

I turn you into ice sculptures and you melt into a puddle in the hot sun. Me and I-am-Link claim the hill.