The Confession Thread *SERIOUS REPLIES*

[Beauts]

Not really a confession, but I guess it kind of is.

Mez you are a good guy and a good friend to many. You've made mistakes, everybody has, but you have a good conscience and good heart I'm glad you're putting it behind you for the better.

I guess it's time for me to make a confession even though well everyone knows about it already but hey

A lot of people have a really negative impression of me and don't get me wrong, I understand why. I am extremely hard to like sometimes. Over the past few years there have been times when I have been really quite mentally ill and during those times I am a different person. I have no control over anything I say or do at times because everything seems to just turn on its head. I have suffered from severe depression, severe anxiety and I am coming to accept some form of PTSD. As some people may know, I was sexually assaulted once. I've kind of pretended to myself for years that I'm fine but I'm not really. Sometimes when I think about it I want to cry and sometimes when I am trying to have sex with someone who isn't trying to abuse me, like my boyfriend, I can't. Its kind of embarrassing but I have a condition which makes me close up "down there". Sometimes I still get flashbacks and I can't feel anything emotionally at all. It's affected a lot.

I suppose with everything I went through as a child too (I won't put everything) there have been times when my brain has been like "that's enough" and then I fall apart. I've gotten a lot better and I think you guys on the forum can probably tell. Lately I have had some setbacks but I start therapy soon. Accepting I need help after so many years was hard but I'm hoping to get better. I regret so many things that I've said and done. I try really hard now not to take it out on other people. I just wanted people to know I was working on it.

 

[Kyru]

I'm secretly black

I seriously laughed out loud at work when I'm suppose to be quiet because of this.

 

[Guest-3]

About 8 months back I was seriously suicidal. I had just come out to my parents that I didn't feel like I should be a girl. Like I physically wanted to be a male, because I was pretty much already mentally male. My parents totally blew me off and I got super depressed, so I went outside with a knife and tried to kill myself. 911 was called, I was shipped off to a "hospital", and psychiatrists were completely baffled at why I acted out that way. Many more episodes came after that, as well as many more hospital visits.
My ex-bestfriend nearly pushed me to suicide INSIDE OF THE SCHOOL. She completely screwed me up and nearly got me arrested because, you know, almost killed myself. Now I hate people. I don't let anyone get that close to me anymore in fear that I will get ****ed up again.

 

[TwiliDreamer]

There are 2 slices of pizza in the fridge. It's past 1 am where I live. I shouldn't eat them, but I confess my resistance dwindles every minute...

 

[DekuNut]

I feel like this thread should be moved to the MD...

 

[DARK MASTER]

I feel like this thread should be moved to the MD...

How hard was it for you to confess this? I imagine sleepless nights.

 

[DekuNut]

You have no idea the struggles I went through to be able to admit that to the world man.

 

[DARK MASTER]

You have no idea the struggles I went through to be able to admit that to the world man.

No worries man, ZeldaDungeon is a supportive community.

 

[Mellow Ezlo]

Okaaaaayyyy, few things here:

1) I stated here more than a year ago that I believed myself to be bisexual, but I wasn't totally sure at the time. I genuinely thought I was, but I wanted confirmation. Recently, certain, uhh, escapades have forced me to accept and confirm that I am indeed bisexual, though leaning slightly more towards females. My sexual attraction to males is fairly weak, though certainly present.

2) I have severe Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder and it's constantly getting worse. I was taking prescribed ADHD pills for a while, but I found that they weren't really helping. I discovered this as one of the primary causes if me slacking off so much in high school because I couldn't concentrate enough to learn any of the material. I can't sit still for more than a few seconds without moving around or fidgeting with something; whenever people are telling me things, I always lose focus and don't take in more than half of what they're saying; it takes me hours to accomplish what could be done in a few minutes because I'm constantly getting distracted. I'm getting really tired of it and I'm seriously considering getting some sort of professional help because I'm worried my future success will be delayed if not stalled completely by it.

3) I have an extremely low patience level and find myself getting pissed off if I have to wait for something for even a few seconds. This is probably to do with my ADHD too. If I'm in a long Drive Thru line, I start freaking out and getting mad at the drivers in front, even though it's not their fault. If something takes a little bit to load, I take it out on the computer. I'm sure the problems I had with my computer were very likely my own fault. I've tried to control it but I just can't.

4) I eat way too much junk food to balance my daily exercise routine. I'm not happy with my body so I go for jogs everyday and hit the gym at least once or twice a week, but I eat an unhealthy amount of junk food almosy every day. You may call it an addiction of sorts, although I don't know if it's quite that bad. Anytime I find money in my possession, I take a walk to 7-11 for chips and pop. This is usually once a week, sometimes even more. My metabolism is really fast so it goes right through me, which causes me to eat more and more.

5) After I was totally clean for a little over 3 years, I started smoking weed again last October. It's not a habit now though, and I only do it socially on occasion, but it's not something I've admitted to people who knew about my previous abuse issue. I don't abuse it now and I don't think I ever really will. I don't see the problem with the occasional social use, the problem herein lies in that I broke a promise I made to myself and the people close to me years ago and officially ended what became a solid three-year streak.

6) Next time I see an animal left to suffocate in a hot vehicle, I'm smashing the window without hesitation. I don't care about the legality of my own actions, there is nothing ok about leaving an animal alone in a hot vehicle, not even for a few seconds. I smashed one person's window last summer and got a small fine, but I don't even care anymore, give me a fine if you want, I'd rather pay that than watch an innocent animal suffer because its owners are ignorant pricks.

 

[DARK MASTER]

Next time I see an animal left to suffocate in a hot vehicle, I'm smashing the window without hesitation. I don't care about the legality of my own actions

PETA would be proud.

 

[Vanessa28]

I feel like this thread should be moved to the MD...

No it shouldn't because there can be any kind of confessions. Plus it's here for a long time now so I see no reason why it should be moved.

 

[Soul]

About 8 months back I was seriously suicidal. I had just come out to my parents that I didn't feel like I should be a girl. Like I physically wanted to be a male, because I was pretty much already mentally male. My parents totally blew me off and I got super depressed, so I went outside with a knife and tried to kill myself. 911 was called, I was shipped off to a "hospital", and psychiatrists were completely baffled at why I acted out that way. Many more episodes came after that, as well as many more hospital visits.
My ex-bestfriend nearly pushed me to suicide INSIDE OF THE SCHOOL. She completely screwed me up and nearly got me arrested because, you know, almost killed myself. Now I hate people. I don't let anyone get that close to me anymore in fear that I will get ****ed up again.

Wow, tragic stuff. I don't really know much to say, other than get away from toxic people. I think you're fine the way you are (as in, a female that identifies as a male). Don't let people tell you otherwise.

Okaaaaayyyy, few things here:

1) I stated here more than a year ago that I believed myself to be bisexual, but I wasn't totally sure at the time. I genuinely thought I was, but I wanted confirmation. Recently, certain, uhh, escapades have forced me to accept and confirm that I am indeed bisexual, though leaning slightly more towards females. My sexual attraction to males is fairly weak, though certainly present.

Same here. Despite what most people think, bisexuality doesn't have to be a 50/50 attraction to both genders. I'm personally about 15% attracted to males and 85% to females, for example.

2) I have severe Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder and it's constantly getting worse. I was taking prescribed ADHD pills for a while, but I found that they weren't really helping. I discovered this as one of the primary causes if me slacking off so much in high school because I couldn't concentrate enough to learn any of the material. I can't sit still for more than a few seconds without moving around or fidgeting with something; whenever people are telling me things, I always lose focus and don't take in more than half of what they're saying; it takes me hours to accomplish what could be done in a few minutes because I'm constantly getting distracted. I'm getting really tired of it and I'm seriously considering getting some sort of professional help because I'm worried my future success will be delayed if not stalled completely by it.

I don't have ADHD myself, so take this with a grain of salt, but to my knowledge there's plenty of things you can do. Therapy is helpful in a lot of situations, and I'm pretty sure there's options for this kind of afliction aswell. You could also try Zen relaxation techniques, something I do to relieve anxiety, but I'm not sure how effective those would be with ADHD.

Apart from those two things, there's something else I get from the following statements:

3) I have an extremely low patience level and find myself getting pissed off if I have to wait for something for even a few seconds. This is probably to do with my ADHD too. If I'm in a long Drive Thru line, I start freaking out and getting mad at the drivers in front, even though it's not their fault. If something takes a little bit to load, I take it out on the computer. I'm sure the problems I had with my computer were very likely my own fault. I've tried to control it but I just can't.

4) I eat way too much junk food to balance my daily exercise routine. I'm not happy with my body so I go for jogs everyday and hit the gym at least once or twice a week, but I eat an unhealthy amount of junk food almosy every day. You may call it an addiction of sorts, although I don't know if it's quite that bad. Anytime I find money in my possession, I take a walk to 7-11 for chips and pop. This is usually once a week, sometimes even more. My metabolism is really fast so it goes right through me, which causes me to eat more and more.

5) After I was totally clean for a little over 3 years, I started smoking weed again last October. It's not a habit now though, and I only do it socially on occasion, but it's not something I've admitted to people who knew about my previous abuse issue. I don't abuse it now and I don't think I ever really will. I don't see the problem with the occasional social use, the problem herein lies in that I broke a promise I made to myself and the people close to me years ago and officially ended what became a solid three-year streak.

Your way of life seems to be rather unhealthy in general. All that junk food surely isn't the case for your problems, but it's not helping either. As someone who used to live exclusively from junk food for a while, I can assure you that eating healthy is very beneficial to a relaxed state of mind.

As for the weed, I advise you to be careful with it. I don't know your previous history with it, and I don't need to know, but again from personal experience, I can confirm that occasionally smoking in social situations probably won't be much of a problem. It does however pose the risk of making you start again. My advise is, if you're going to smoke, set some rules first. When I started smoking again after stopping for half a year, my rule was that I could never have any pot for myself, because I knew I couldn't control it. I stopped completely afterwards because it wasn't doing me any good even if I did it rarely, but that's a different matter.

6) Next time I see an animal left to suffocate in a hot vehicle, I'm smashing the window without hesitation. I don't care about the legality of my own actions, there is nothing ok about leaving an animal alone in a hot vehicle, not even for a few seconds. I smashed one person's window last summer and got a small fine, but I don't even care anymore, give me a fine if you want, I'd rather pay that than watch an innocent animal suffer because its owners are ignorant *****s.

Thumbs up to you friend.

 

[Dan]

I don't know how to put it but I'm actually feeling pretty relaxed with myself.

 

[kokirion]

I don't know how to put it but I'm actually feeling pretty relaxed with myself.

that's also nice to hear from people once in a while

 

[Vanessa28]

About 8 months back I was seriously suicidal. I had just come out to my parents that I didn't feel like I should be a girl. Like I physically wanted to be a male, because I was pretty much already mentally male. My parents totally blew me off and I got super depressed, so I went outside with a knife and tried to kill myself. 911 was called, I was shipped off to a "hospital", and psychiatrists were completely baffled at why I acted out that way. Many more episodes came after that, as well as many more hospital visits.
My ex-bestfriend nearly pushed me to suicide INSIDE OF THE SCHOOL. She completely screwed me up and nearly got me arrested because, you know, almost killed myself. Now I hate people. I don't let anyone get that close to me anymore in fear that I will get ****ed up again.

This is so sad to hear. My brother came to me in 2008 and told me he wanted to be a woman. I supported him and now 8 years later he is no longer a he but a she. And I'm very proud You should have gotten full support and not the cold shoulder. People have no idea what is going on inside other people not even their own kids. And being suicial is very bad. So your so called best friend at the time was everything but a friend. I can easily say "hold on, it'll get better" but that's something I can't say because every person is different. I hope you're going to get through all this and come out stronger