- Joined
- Jun 15, 2020
- Location
- Canada
– Page 2 –
Some Corporations Have None of the Luck
By J. Jonah Jameson
Sources have confirmed that Norman Osborn’s OsCorp has had a string of unfavorable setbacks in the recent weeks. First Osborn’s business partner, Mendel Stromm was arrested for embezzling money from the corporation. We believe he remains behind bars currently with bail set for $47,500. Then the labs were ransacked while Osborn was reportedly at a Parent’s Night for his son’s school. Inside sources revealed that Osborn’s personal project was the target of the burglary, but had no information on what exactly that project entailed. Despite these woes, Osborn remains steadfast at the head of the table, leading the ship into brighter futures. Investor confidence remains strong, as there have been no rushes on selling OsCorp stocks since the incidents.
Information about Norman's financial prospects is hard to come by. Any attempt to determine their personal net worth would be unable to determine the value of their Corporate Account. Their status as the majority shareholder of OsCorp is public record, but what significance a majority share might have and the chemicals and weapons it might grant access to is unclear. That said, as the CEO of OsCorp, it's entirely possible and likely that he also possesses "job" type abilities.
A "job" ability is a secret fourth type of ability that is not covered by the front page rules. It is similar to an item ability, except it can't be stolen or destroyed but can be reassigned, usually by the "boss" (often the majority shareholder for a corporation). People can be fired and hired for these jobs by this "boss" (be it a person or corporation). Jobs always offer multiple abilities which, in a manner similar to communal abilities, aren't technically considered "theirs". If you somehow "lost all of your abilities" you would still be able to use your job abilities.
We here at the Daily Bugle take an optimistic outlook towards Norman Osborn and the future of OsCorp and hope for a fruitful relationship in the times to come.
– Page 3 –
Letters to the Editor
By Joseph "Robbie" Robertson
Anonymous said:There is a pirate among us. Steve is the most sus!
Dear Anonymous,
I don’t see any reason to suspect Steve more or less than anyone else, but thanks for writing!
-Ed.
Anonymous said:Let us celebrate the REAL heroes! Colonel John Jameson has, through his work on the space program, done a great service to not only the nation, but to the world. As such, this anonymous benefactor would like to award him financially for his achievements. Unfortunately, all attempts at contacting the Colonel have been unsuccessful, and as such a reward of $1000 is hereby promised to the first person who provides a way to contact him.
Dear Anonymous,
That’s my boss J. Jonah Jameson’s son. He’s certainly quite a hero, but I wouldn’t be comfortable with giving his information to someone who isn’t even willing to reveal their own identity, especially for what is likely a fairly trivial amount for anyone with a decent job. I wouldn’t be surprised if such a figure were to be rescued by some kind of masked super-powered vigilante at some point.
-Ed
Anonymous said:Norman Osborn for Mayor!
Everyone knows what he has done, everyone knows what he's about, and everyone knows that he has this towns best interests at heart! Endorse Norman for mayor and the town will prosper beyond your wildest beliefs, all enemies to the town will die, and even Spider-man will be an accepted and adored member of our prosperous society.
Norman will always keep himself available to anyone who has questions and wants to chat and has nothing to hide. Is the Goblin formula potentially dangerous? Yes, in the wrong hands, which is why Norman will keep it safe and locked up, never to be spread again.
Thank you for your time and remember, if you want to keep our city untorn, vote for Osborn!
(Paid for by the "Osborn for Mayor 20XX" group)
Dear Anonymous,
Norman Osborn does seem like an outstanding figure who might be just what this city needs to crack down on the corruption and crime in our cities, but my sense of journalistic integrity requires that I learn more before I take any sort of official stance myself.
Wait, did I just get a letter to the editor from a PAC?
-Ed
FELICIA HARDY said:Lain starting in jail faer first game here is pretty sad. I really think our resident super wealthy celebrity freddeh should do something about that!
-Felicia Hardy
Dear Felicia,
Thanks for writing! Yeah, my sympathies go out to those who started outside the game arrested, exiled, or sent to the MYSTERY ZONE. I’m sure Freddeh could probably get something done with all of his raw capital, smarts, and public support, but I wouldn’t expect him to do anything without knowing it was in his benefit to do so. That said, I’m no expert on Norman Osborn.
-Ed
Anonymous said:Get ready to see Spiderman spinning his webs and capturing criminals on this very newpaper just... 15 years from now
Dear Anonymous,
What’s a Spider-Man?
-Ed.
– Page 3, Continued –
Editor's Note
By Joseph "Robbie" Robertson
Dear Readers,
We’ve got a lot of problems with organized crime here in New York City. We here at the Daily Bugle are not afraid of getting to the truth of the matter and exposing corruption hidden in the darkest parts of this city’s underbelly.
The Daily Bugle is here for pure unbiased reporting of the facts (aside from our opinion pieces, JJJ sometimes gets a bit carried away). I cannot guarantee that my entire staff is Town like last game (which did technically take place sometime in the future, since this game is a prequel), but I can say that the Daily Bugle staff is like a family. We look after our own and we will do everything in our power to solve the many mysteries of the game.
Please send any and all information you can that might lead to the elimination of any and all threats to Town.
We’re always looking for new hires, especially ones whose first and last names use alliteration.
I can see your letters to the editor regardless of whether or not I publish them. Please let me know if you want some or all of your message published, shared with the rest of the Daily Bugle staff, or carefully guarded by myself personally. If no instructions are enclosed about what to do with the information you send me, I will use my own discretion on what to publish and what to [REDACT]. I do accept bribes.
Keep up the good work everyone,
Robbie Robertson
EDITOR-IN-CHIEF OF THE DAILY BUGLE
Contact Us
– Page 4 –
– Page 5 –
Sleep is Important
By Joseph "Robbie" Robertson
Be sure to get plenty of sleep! This mafia game is sure to eat up a lot of your time and energy (I'm basically a dried up husk already and it's only been like 5 hours in game) but make sure you get enough sleep every night you can and don't neglect your other basic needs like food and proper hydration. A little sunlight and exercise doesn't hurt either. Stay healthy, stay happy, and stay tuned for more news in future issues.
– Page 6 –
JJJ's Rants
By J. Jonah Jameson
You know who is probably really behind the vicious looting of OsCorp don’t you? It’s those damn masked vigilantes. Undoubtedly they broke in to steal experimental equipment so that they can destroy MORE of the city as they “fight crime”. More like just fight with each other over who looks stupider in their Halloween costumes. If you really want to fight crime, you better just turn yourself in!! Breaking the law to stop someone else from breaking the law is still a crime! You don’t get a blind eye turned to you simply because you claim you’re on the good guys side. You want to know who is really on the good guys side? It’s our boys in blue. The NYPD. Not only are they out there fighting actual criminals instead of costume nutters, but they are doing it by the book. Within the law. Without hiding their identities. Because they aren’t criminals. These boys are willing to put it all on the line like REAL American Heroes. So the next time you masked clowns decide you’re doing this great city a favor by putting innocent citizens in danger with your ray guns or what not, just don’t. Leave the mask at home. Sign up for the Police Academy. Do things right by God and Country. Let OUR boys handle these criminals instead of being one yourself.
– Page 7 –
Enigmatic Reporter Ned Leeds Self-Proclaimed NYC's Most Eligible Bachelor New York City
By Ned Leeds
Aug 14, 2023 – In a glittering soirée held at a prestigious venue in the heart of New York City [his own living room], the enigmatic reporter Ned Leeds was unofficially crowned as the city's most eligible bachelor by himself.
Just look at this dashing man!
(Photography by Lance Bannon)
With his alleged magnetic charm and mysterious aura, Leeds has become someone who considers himself a captivating figure in the bustling metropolis, igniting fascination and admiration among New Yorkers [himself and at least his mother]. Leeds, often referred to as the "Investigative Charmer" by himself is a tall and charismatic individual known for believing he possesses impeccable fashion sense and a captivating presence. His modestly successful career as a junior reporter, combined with an air of intrigue, has made him a subject of both professional respect and personal curiosity.
– Page 8 –
Classifieds
Sometimes, you just gotta know, ya know?
Hey, I don't judge.
Whoever's dirty laundry you need me to dig up, I guarantee I've seen worse.
Let me poke around in it so you don't have to waste your time.
Top tier Tracking. No ability activation is required! Only money.
You pay, I get you results. Simple as pie.
Rates are cheap. $500 per Day/Night, or $1500 for the whole Cycle.
That's right, I can tail a person Day and Night. No "can't use the 'same' ability twice in one cycle" can stop me.
So don't delay. Reach out to your local Mod today.
Ask for Mac.
Would you like to see your own classified ads here? Now, you can! Send a message to the Mod with what you'd like to include, make sure you identify it as a classified ad, and attach your cheque for $500.
– Page 9 –
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– Page 10 –
Calvin and Hobbes
Nancy
Heathcliff
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