SANTA! SANTA! SANTA! I want a fire truck, a snow mobile, a shaving kit, a rusty shovel, a subscription to Chunkey Puffs monthly, a bag of toenail clippings, a unicycle, a baby Eskimo, a trombone, a saxophone a jacksophone, everything else that ends with -one, a duck that vomits pink lemonade, a kite, a third nipple, a .... Wait a minute. Aren't you that fat guy that lives across the street, just dressed like Santa? Also, wasn't Christmas three months ago?