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I teleport the cookie into my hands. I have the cookie.

I blow you all up and take de cookie. COOKIE IS MINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

I destroy all the pathetic copies and take the cookie. I HAZ DA COOKIE!

I shoot you through with an arrow, and I take the cookie. I HAZ DA COOKIE!

I blast you with a bazooka, and take the cookie. I HAZ DA COOKIE!

I take the cookie, and clean it off. I have the cookie, take that!

There's only one cookie. You only get one cookie. I call forth my raccoon minions and they snatch the cookie from you. They bring me the cookie. I HAZ DA COOKIE!

Right as you do so, Hyrule starts to drown. You see a kid in green fighting Ganondorf. You try to go help, you find the portal to the real world, use it, only to find that I switched the portal location into the volcano. You die by lava, and I take the cookie with lava-proof gloves, and put it...

You hide in Ganondorf's place, right when Valoo burns it down. After the fire has died down, I go in and kick your corpse off the boat thing and take the cookie. I HAZ DA COOKIE!

I still haz da cookie in a secure location!

The cookies spins around and lands at my feet. I take it and pocket it. I then send it to the gap between dimensions where Phantom Ganon will guard it. I HAZ DA COOKIE IN A SECURE LOCATION!

I lock down the airport you run to, teleport inside, snatch the cookie, and teleport somewhere else.

You go on a quest to destroy the cookie in Mount Doom, but Sauron takes you over and he takes the cookie from you, and returns to full strength. After a long hard battle to Mount Doom, Sauron has the cookie.

I drop a nuclear bomb on Atlantis, blowing it up. The cookie (and your blood) come up to the surface. I grab the cookie. I HAVE THE COOKIE!

I tell you that that cookies been thrown off a mountain, flushed down a toilet, barfed up by raccoons, and has plenty of germs on it, and you don't really want it. While you are pondering this, I take the cookie. I have the cookie.

Yeah, it's quite imaginative. So anyway.... I grab your wrist until you can't feel it anymore and are forced to drop the cookie. I explode you with a grenade, and take da cookie. I TOOK DA COOKIE!

I trap you in a glitch, and pop the cookie out of the glitch and into my hand. I HAZ DE COOKIE!

I take away your reputation, and you die from the shock. I take da cookie!

I accidently open a portal to Termina, and Majora comes and takes the cookie and turns you into a Deku. MAJORA HAS THE COOKIE!

I go down there and take the remains of the cookie from your stomach and use a scientific machine to restore the cookie. I HAVE THE COOKIE!

I flood your inbox with Pm's all saying, GIVE ME THE COOKIE. GIVE ME THE COOKIE. Due to the fact that I infused hypnotism in those PM's you give me the cookie. I HAVE THE COOKIE!

Ye god. I send some mutated cockroaches after the birds and they take the cookie, and give it to me. I haz da cookie.

I zap you with a ray gun and take the cookie. I HAVE THE COOKIE!

I make your siggy come to life and attack you. They give me the cookie. I HAVE THE COOKIE!

I make you have a negative reputation, and it is agreed that the cookie should be in the hands of someone more responsible (me). I HAVE THE COOKIE!

You're banned for being in this thread. I TAKE THE COOKIE!

I trap you inside your own spoiler. I TAKE THE COOKIE!

I become an administrator and ban you from ZD. With nowhere else to go, the cookie lies there, and I TAKE THE COOKIE!

I throw you into the Deku Palace and take the cookie. I HAVE THE COOKIE!

I attack your siggy with a walnut, and out of terror you drop the cookie. I HAVE THE STINKING COOKIE!

I hit you with another Deku Nut. I HAVE THE COOKIE!

Since you're the son of Manus (whoever that is) I complain to him, so he sends you to your room and gives me the cookie. I HAVE THE COOKIE!

I take your avatar and make it come to life and start attacking you and bring me the cookie. I DO SO VERY MUCH HAV DA COOKIE!

I take a deku nut and stun you with it, and take the cookie. I have thee cookie.

I give you Navi for free. I don't even try to take the cookie! She annoys you so much that you kill yourself, and I take the cookie. I HAVE THE COOKIE!

I push you off the mountain. I HAVE THE COOKIE!

I take the triforce in your avatar, touch it, and grant my wish that I have the cookie, and that nobody can reach me. Great. I'm on Mt. Everest.

Is the cookie the ashes? Or what? Anyway........... I send my raccoon minions after the cookie. :) Now they're running off. -_- Now they're heading into the ocean. >:( COME BACK HERE YOU STINKING RACCOON! Stinking raccoon: (in raccoon language) I have the cookie!

The ant's friends take revenge on you for killing their friend (the cookies poison, right?) and in gratitude, give it to me. I HAVE THE SHINY NEW COOKIE!

I tell you that that cookie's been slashed, stabbed, flushed down a toilet, and barfed up and that you don't really want it. I take the cookie from you when you are pondering this. I have the stinky cookie.

I take your Z and use it as a boomerang and snag the cookie! I CLAIM THE STINKIN COOKIE!

I unleash rabid turtles on you and take the cookie!

I take the hyphens in your username and use them as throwing knives, and skewer the cookie and pin it to the wall AND I TAKE THE COOKIE WITH A HOLE IN IT!

......How'd Zelway get the cookie? It was in the sewage.... I put my raccoons in a cannon, launch them, and fly across and take the cookie. Great. They landed in the lake. The cokkie's wet....

I get more raccoons and I take the cooke from them, but the get mad and corner me when I'm on the toilet, and I'm surprised so I DROP THE COOKIE DOWN THE TOILET AND THE RACCOONS FLUSH IT AWAY!

I resurrect my raccoons and they take the cookie and run away from me. MY ZOMBIE RACCOONS HAVE THE COOKIE!

I get a whole bunch of other raccoons to attack you and BRING ME THE COOKIE! Uh oh. One of them barfed it up.

I become a raccoon with a superpowerful tongue and blast you into the wall AND EAT THE COOKIE! (and barfs it back up)

I replace Shadow's sunglasses with a nuclear bomb, and because he's your shadow, you blow up too. I RUN AWAY FROM THE RADIOACTIVITY AND CLAIM THE COOTIE!

I become an angel and dive down and save the cookie. I DO VERY VERY MUCH HAVE THE COOKIE..... thing............