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But you took a decoy cookie so I casually pick up the real one.

I eat other cookies and become so fat that I become massive enough to create a noticeable gravitational force and the cookie starts orbiting me when I walk by it. I don't notice the cookie orbiting me but I have it!

I wave my hands around and magically the cookie appears in my hand. I have the cookie.

I arm my kittens with samurai swords and they take the cookie from you. I claim the cookie.

I fart out poisonous gas. FTNWO and Manly Men put on gas masks and take the cookie.

But Kriby doesn't exist because he imploded with the rest of the universe. We still have the cookie!

Chuck was killed by our Bruce Lee. FTNWO/the universe still has the cookie.

The universe implodes except for the FTNWO and our headquarters, essentially making us the universe! The universe takes the cookie.

I didn't watch the video so I wasn't destroyed by whatever takes place in the video. I stab you in the throat with a fork. FTNWO takes the cookie

The FTNWO traps you with our leftover syrup. We take the cookie.

The cookie was hidden inside the cupcake this whole time. I take the cookie.

I press the reset button. now penguinboy82 has the cookie again.

The flying pottery in the Spirit Temple kill you. I find the cookie and get out before I get killed by the pottery.

But you rented the Poltergust from a vacuum shop that I own and you had to return it before you can empty it because the late fee is already too high. I have the Poltergust and the cookie.

It turns out none of us had the cookie the whole time. I found the real cookie while cutting grass.

It's only a hallucination. Mine is real, though.

You hit a bowling pin that was painted to look like a penguin...

I was wearing the penguin suit the whole time so none of that ever happened and I still have the cookie.

That wasn't actually the cookie, it was a decoy/bomb that blows you up. I hide the cookie in my penguin suit.

I annihilate six of the cookies, superglue MY glasses to my face and lock Caleb, of Asui in a Gerudo prison. I has teh cookie.

You're banned for using the wrong type of shampoo. Darn it, wrong thread. Since you were banned that means the cookie has no owner. I take the cookie.

I poke you until you spontaniously combust. I pry the cookie from your burnt corpse.

I beat you in the @ss with a hammer until you die from getting beaten in the @ss with a hammer. (Just like Abraham Lincoln) I claim the hill. While you are all distracted from laughing at me for claiming the hill in the claim the cookie thread I steal the cookie and beat you all in the @ss...

I steal the cookie and hide it in the cookie jar. (Nobody will ever look there!) I claim the cookie.

I pm you a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick, you're dead. I leave the cookie out for Santa. Santa has the cookie.

I burn you with a giant magnfying glass. I take the cookie.

I wish I could give you reputation for that! :lol: Anyway, I blow you up and somehow the cookie survives. I take the cookie.

I sprinkle mortality dust on you which allows you to die. Then the force of all of those deadly blows hit you all at once. I take the cookie.

Pac Man eats you (But not the cookie). I take the cookie.

I give a meth addict, who think's he's George Washington, an axe. He mistakes you for a cherry tree and chopps you in half. I claim the cookie.

You get mauled by a bear. You don't survive but the cookie does. I claim the cookie and protect it by hiding on a moon. NOTE: I said a moon not the Moon. There are so many moons out there that you'll be searching forever!

Another thing, the cookie is poisioned so you can't eat it. Read the origional post. After you die I sergically remove the chewed up cookie from you. I claim the cookie.

There's only one cookie... It's the last one in the universe; that's why we're fighting over it. I still have the cookie.

I invent a cookie magnet that can attract the cookie from miles away. I claim the cookie.

I use hacks to replace all of the lightbulbs in your house with Iorn Knuckles. Since no one can survive while that many Iorn Knuckles are attacking you die. I sneak into your house to claim the cookie when the Iorn Knuckles fall asleep.

I raise your taxes so high that you have to sell the cookie (to me) to keep a roof over your head. I claim the cookie.

The cookie reaches it's expiration date and turns into a zombie cookie. The zombie cookie kills everyone but me then I de-zombify it. I claim the cookie.

I trade you the cookie for a 1-up mushroom. I take the cookie. (I almost said hill again)

I slit your throat with a rusty buchers knife. There, problem solved.

I shoot a beam at your mind that makes you afraid of cookies. When you see the cookie in your hand you run away in terror. I claim the cookie.

*Burns Zelway's body* Also, I send a helicoptor to drop a giant radioactive coconut on SwiftestPhantom. I take the cookie.

I distract you with my amazing abbility to juggle 37 bowling balls at the same time while my pet ninja-tiger sneaks up behind you to enject poison into your neck. My ninja-tiger and I take the cookie.

I play Alvin and the Chipmunks music on max volume until your ears bleed and to have to be rushed to the hospital. I claim the bloody cookie.

I'll make you a deal. I'll bet you one cookie that the link below is a Rock Roll. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHg5SJYRHA0

*Presents "Get out of losing the game free" card* I don't lose the game and I make you lose the game. When you lose the game your head explodes. I claim the cookie.

I lead you into the same room as Tingle. I claim the cookie.

I throw a guitar at you. I claim the cookie.

Your entire crew gets so drunk that they all fall overboard. Leaving only the poorly armed captain (you) to face my army of Pokemon. I claim the hill.

I give your computer a virus that turns it into something from of a Terminator movie that kills you. I claim the hill.

I walk by you with a cup of milk then the cookie jumps out of your hand and fallows me. I claim the cookie.