The false promise of "it'll get better" is a disgusting one. I hate when people stay together when they are unhappy together. If it really is so bad that you cannot stand each other, then break up and move on with your lives. K? Eventually when those two people have kids, those kids will be FUBAR (srsly) and then the original people will start to try and control those kids, only to make those kids hate each other and that just leads to more and more of this madness.
Why Do People Stay Together when They Know They're Unhappy?
- Thread starter Ventus
- Start date
Curmudgeon
default setting: sarcastic prick
- Joined
- Dec 17, 2012
- Gender
- grumpy
Divorce is very expensive.
Because love is more than personal happiness.
Sydney
The Good Samaritan
I have a friend who's in a relationship, and although her satisfaction with said relationship fluctuates often, it's usually somewhat negative. Most recently her boyfriend forgot her birthday (which is a big no-no), and yet they're still together. They've been through other **** before that's made her very upset, and yet they're still together. It kind of bothers me, because I don't want to see her upset, but I know that sometimes he makes her happy. I'm not her, but if I was I would've broken off the relationship ages ago.
My point is that every relationship is different, and every person involved in their own unique relationship(s) is different. You can't tell someone to move on with their life when you don't know their situation, because it's fairly ignorant to say that. All you can do is offer your support to the fullest extent, and hope that they resolve their issues soon.
My point is that every relationship is different, and every person involved in their own unique relationship(s) is different. You can't tell someone to move on with their life when you don't know their situation, because it's fairly ignorant to say that. All you can do is offer your support to the fullest extent, and hope that they resolve their issues soon.
There are many reasons why. One such reason is investment. Both partners have shared assets and friends, plus have invested time into the relationship. By leaving the relationship they risk losing the shared friends and often the assets as well, there is also the unwillingness to give up on something after they have invested years of time into it.
Justac00lguy
BooBoo
- Joined
- Jul 1, 2012
- Gender
- Shewhale
People who usually stay in such relationships, however toxic they may be, do so because they're attached to that person. Relationships aren't all sunshine and lollipops, a lot of it is tough - this is because you love that person so much that you don't want to risk losing them. Breaking up isn't easy, especially when you love that person. It's like taking away a a big chunk of your body.
Burning Beast
Go to Hell 4 Heavens Sake
- Joined
- Dec 6, 2012
- Location
- Zelda Dungeon
Couldn't put it any better then my main man JC. I have a friend and we've been tight for a long time but lately she and I have been going through a tough time (this is a friendship btw but it applies to romantic relationships cause when you are really in a romantic relationship with someone at least imo it's exactly like a regular best friendship with the romance tacked on as well, but that's just me) anyhoo, been a rough last few weeks but we're getting through it. If I hadn't grown so fond of her and she of me, we'd probably just been like, **** it bye-bye a long time ago. But she's like a sister to me, and I don't want to lose her. I'm scared to, because I remember the good times, and I know that if we keep at it, we will eventually get back to those good times again. Misconceptions and mistrust and various things hurt relationships and make people unhappy. But just think how much more unhappy this world would be if everyone left each other at the drop of the hat. I personally believe very strongly in giving everyone my best shot. I don't feel like I can look myself in the eye if I leave people behind who were/are close to me without giving it my all first. Trust would not exist, it wouldn't truly exist if we didn't work through the hard times and kept a stiff upper lip. You never truly know a person till they go through a hard time. But, you don't ONLY know a person when they are going through a hard time. How they act in a hard time might sometimes not be pretty, but working through it with them may open the door to a better life and closer relationship with that person.
And to me, that's worth sticking through the hard times for. It's worth the risk to me.
And to me, that's worth sticking through the hard times for. It's worth the risk to me.
- Joined
- May 4, 2014
- Location
- California
co-dependence
not having enough money for a place of your own
one or both parties may still love the other
threats and abuse
staying together for the kids
not having enough money for a place of your own
one or both parties may still love the other
threats and abuse
staying together for the kids
Beauts
Rock and roll will never die
I know I'm late, but I agree. I think it's stupid and unfair to those around them. Life is too short. By all means try to fix it but recognise a lost cause.
Doc
BoDoc Horseman
- Joined
- Nov 24, 2012
- Gender
- Male
Everyone who gets in a relationship had a reason to get in a relationship did so because they liked the person. People tend to stay in a toxic relationship because they don't want to believe that that feeling of affection is gone. It is hard to admit to both ourselves and others.
Similarly to Burning Beast, I had a friendship that I think works as a example. The person I called my best friend had moved away, and he came back a year later. And our friendship clearly was not working and something that I was clinging onto. But I refused to admit that the friendship was over because I still remembered how great it was to hang out with him when we were younger. It made me feel awful to be around him and even though we were both different, I continued to tell myself that it was still the same. It took me a while but I eventually realized it was over.
The same can be said for romantically involved couples. They are all hoping that the honeymoon phase is still happening and nothing has changed at all. Even though they are unhappy they just stick through it.
Similarly to Burning Beast, I had a friendship that I think works as a example. The person I called my best friend had moved away, and he came back a year later. And our friendship clearly was not working and something that I was clinging onto. But I refused to admit that the friendship was over because I still remembered how great it was to hang out with him when we were younger. It made me feel awful to be around him and even though we were both different, I continued to tell myself that it was still the same. It took me a while but I eventually realized it was over.
The same can be said for romantically involved couples. They are all hoping that the honeymoon phase is still happening and nothing has changed at all. Even though they are unhappy they just stick through it.