King of the Hill!

[Linknmike]

I point out that it's 2011, and while you reminince all the good memories of 2010, I stab you in the back.

I claim the hill.

 

[Frigidblade]

I throw you into the freezer that's covered in dynamite. It's now lit.
I claim the hill.

 

[Zelda64]

I shoot you.
I claim the hill.

 

[Cel-Shaded Deku]

Your unoriginality becomes your ultimate downfall.

I claim the hill

 

[Hawk the Warior]

Your unseemingly gigantic vocabulary pulverizes thou.

I claim the hill.

 

[Cel-Shaded Deku]

I write your name in my Death Note.

I claim the hill.

 

[Zelda64]

I kamehameha you.
I claim the hill.

 

[Link8150]

I Spirit Bomb you,
I claim the hill

 

[Cel-Shaded Deku]

I catch you shaking down the money off of my money trees, shoot you with a tranquilizer dart, and feed you to the lions at the local zoo.

I claim the hill.

 

[MrLuigi]

I sell you propane and propane accessories. I'm King of the Hill.

 

[Link8150]

I go to punch you but you dodge it. After dodging it you trip and fall through a manhole
I claim the hill

 

[Zelda64]

Mario comes along and jumps on you.
I claim the hill.

 

[Cel-Shaded Deku]

Mario mistakes your head for a mushroom and he eats it.

I claim the hill.

 

[Linknmike]

My head turns out to be a mushroom and he grows and steps on you.

I claim the hill.

 

[Cel-Shaded Deku]

I beat you with a bat until you're unconscious (or until you're dead, whatever comes first).

I claim the hill.