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Zelda Art Untitled LoZ Twilight Princess Fanfic (PG-13)

Cabbage

Supreme Vegetable Ruler
So, here is my long - awaited Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess Fanfic! Wait- no one knew about it!? Oh well. NOW YA DO.
This is very LOOSELY based off of TP- with a few new main characters and such. :D Cuz I be cewl liek dat.
The prolouge is very short. I'm sorry about that, but there wasn't much to put. I was going to put in spoilers cuz some might find gory, but dey didn't work when I tried. :/ Sorry.
:lol: MWAHAHAHA!!

Prologue
I awoke from my nightmare, jumping up involuntarily and gasping for air. I knew he was coming for me; and soon. And from what I learned in my dream, he was nearby as well, coming from the deeper part of Faron Woods. I leapt out of the tree I had been sleeping in without a second thought, grabbing my messenger bag before I fell. I slung it on when I hit the ground and began to run north, towards Ordon Village; if I made it there safely, I could hide and be safe. He wouldn’t dare to try to kill me in such a heavily populated place; atleast I didn't think so.
The moon lit up my path as I passed by Faron’s Spring, and as I ran I began to think what he would do if he did manage to get the triforce from me; probably try to take over the twilight. I thought. Then set the world in eternal darkness. I snorted to myself. As usual.I continued running, passing by Ordon's spring, beginning to get out of breath. I wasn’t observing my surroundings very well, and so I narrowly missed tripping over a tree root, struggling to regain my balance. Suddendly, I saw something fly out from behind the tree, and I felt it clip me in the stomach; it almost felt like a stab. Finally, I lost my balance and fell, clenching my stomach in pain; strangely feeling something sharp embedded in it. I barely noticed the tree roots digging into my back. I looked up and saw my father; my worst enemy; Ganondorf.


“Daughter.” He says, withdrawing what looked like a spear- I couldn’t really tell, my vision was fogging. “You have suprised me. I would have at least expected you to flee the correct direction.” He shook his head with mock dissapointment. What!? I think. But my dreams never lie… Unless he somehow manipulated them… I suddenly feel a wave of cold hit my body; the thing in my stomach must’ve been poisonous.
I tried to run before he could get to me, but he dug his spear into my right forearm, painfully dragging it downwards. The look on his face told me he was enjoying it. I could've sworn I heard something pop as I squealed a little, grabbing his spear with my other hand to try to pull it out. But before I could do anything, he kicked my face, leaving a stinging pain on my cheek. With the poison in my veins, I was powerless.

Blood dripped out of my wounds as he suddenly withdrew, grabbing my neck and pinning me against the tree. I shuddered at his touch, struggling to regain my breath.

“Finally….” He mutters, his eyes filled with excitement, “I can take what is rightfully mine!”
Slowly, I felt my power ebbing away, making me feel weaker and weaker…. I could swear his grip on my neck was getting tighter, making it difficult to breathe. I wished I could fight back, but I felt paralyzed, and there wasn't much a kid could do with someone grabbing their neck. Suddendly, it was gone - my power wasn't with me anymore. He dropped me, smirking, as I felt my head hit the ground painfully.I blinked slowly; my ears begin to ring, and another wave of cold. Cloudy black spots began to enter my vision, and I saw his lips move; I couldn’t do anything as he trudged off into the Faron Woods. The cold in my veins began to get painful, like a stinging, numbing, sensation; the poison was fully taking effect. As my vision turned cloudy and black, the last thing I would ever remember from that night is seeing the full moon in the sky- one day, I hoped it would guide me once more as my life faded away.

So, you peeps liek? No liek? I would LOOVE to know! :D And if anybody can come up with a good title for the fic, I would love to know! :D
Like I say, sorry for the shortness! I will make Chapter 1 when I feel liek it, cuz I have to come up with ideas. :/
Thanx yous for reading! :D
 
Last edited:

Ganondork

goo
Joined
Nov 12, 2010
It was alright. You could definitely work on your descriptions. Simply because we know what Ganondorf looks like doesn't me you don't have to describe him. Description is one of the most important parts of a story, without it, you're allowing your reader to think of anything they want. And:

I looked up and saw my father; mankind’s ([ooc] Hylian, gerudo, zora, you get it...) worst enemy; Ganondorf.

Do not ever leave context. It disrupts the entire story's flow.
 

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