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General Art The Hidden World

Toboe

Melody Malone
Joined
Feb 14, 2011
Location
Mars
Here it is guys.:D

The hidden world

Chapter 1: The first day

One day a 16 year old girl named Emily was walking around the town of Irshia, a small town with only five houses, an Inn, a stable, a shop, and an armory shop. On each person’s lawn there was a tree and some grass. The town has a great big wall made of bricks surrounding it, and next to Emily’s house is an exit, and a carriage outside of town.

The last house Emily lives in, the house to her right old man Jenkins there, the house next to that, Emily’s best friend Tekara, the house next to Tekara is a young lady Acra, many call her, and a nice young family lives on the other side of town

As Emily walked by Tekara ‘s house Tekara came running out saying, “Hey Emily I’ve been waiting for you!”

Tekara had dark brown hair in two French braids, emerald green eyes, a light blue tunic, tight tan pants, leather brown boots, and a pendant containing a single green stone that matches her eyes. Emily had shoulder length brown hair, blue eyes, light skin, an average body build, a red robe with a yellow rim at the opening of the robe, brown boots and a green necklace.

“What do you mean you’ve been waiting for me?” Emily asked.
“Yeah. Don’t you remember Justin’s birthday party?”

“Oh yeah. Wait Justin who?”

“You know, medium length black hair, almost always wearing a grey cloak with his hood up, sometimes it’s overshadowing his face?” Tekara explained moving her arms to match her words.

“Oh. Wait his birthday party is today?” Emily asked.

“No the setup is today.”

“Oh. Well let me take a walk. And I’ll see you at his house?”

“My house.”

So Tekara went into her house and Emily started to finish her walk thinking of what to get Justin.

“Maybe I should get him plates? No! Why did I even think of that idea.” Emily said aloud to herself.

When she was done her walk she went to Tekara’s house and before she could even knock on the door Tekara opened it and let her in. They started setting up and were done a few hours later.

Emily stayed and talked for a while and had dinner with Tekara and her family, then went home. At her house she had a tree and some grass, no porch and her house was made of brick as is everyone else’s house. When you go inside there is the dining room/living room, a hall way with some pictures of her and her family, then a door that leads into her room.

Her parents weren’t there.

“Huh, normally my parents are in the living room, I mean it is there room.” She said aloud to herself.

She walked in her room, which had a dresser and a bed which was made.

She lay down and thought, they must have gone out for dinner or something.

She fell asleep wondering where her parents were.


Hope you liked it.:D
 

Keyari

翼のエルフ
Joined
Jul 13, 2011
Location
Rivendell, Middle Earth
This is very interesting. I like the prologue, it's a nice size. There was a few mistakes but nothing too bad. Great job, I can't wait to see how this story develops. :D
 

Toboe

Melody Malone
Joined
Feb 14, 2011
Location
Mars
Well because I've been so busy lately, I don't know, but I'm trying so hard to just keep making it. This up comeing chapter might be just as short as the other one or a little longer.

Oops I forgot some details about my charctar well here is the details I forgot,

Name: Emily
Race: Human
Gender: Female
Age: 16
Looks: Brown hair shoulder length, blue eyes, light skin, average body build, red robe yellow rim at the opening of the robe, brown boots, green necklace
Personality: nice, smart very talkative person always trying to put comedy into every subject, is a happy joyful person, tries to cheer people up when there down. That’s all I can think of for now :)
Class: Mage
weapons: None
Magic: Water
Skills: Nothing that I can think of yet
Other: has a staff
 
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Toboe

Melody Malone
Joined
Feb 14, 2011
Location
Mars
Sorry for the delay but here is the next chapter.:sweat:

Chapter 2: Justin’s Party

She dreamt of the party and there was a blue sign that said Happy Birthday Justin! And a pink couch that everybody sat on (only because only five people had gone to the party in her dream). There was also a chimney with a fire going and a rug underneath the couch. Justin was talking to Tekara.

Others that Emily didn’t know were talking to each other.

Emily was walking into the kitchen/dining room, with a sink, a few cabinets, and a black counter.

Emily opened one of the cabinets and saw a few cups, plates and bowls. She grabbed a cup then got some water and drank it.

She got up from her dream and then realized that she will be late for the party. She got out of her bed checked if she had her lucky robe on (and she did), then checked if she had her boots (and she did), grabbed some paper and a pencil and left a note for her parents that she’ll be back at midnight.

She left the house and went to the party, it looked just like it did in her dream, but this time she walked over to Tekara and sat down.

“So what took you so long?” Tekara asked.

“I slept in.” Emily replied.

“Oh, I guess all that hard work that you did on this party was making you sleepy?” Tekara said in a humorous way.

“Yeah must have been all that hard work.” Emily said while she scratched the back of her head and smiled.

“Not” Tekara coughed.

They both laughed.

Then Justin came into the conversation and said, “You two know I’ve just been sitting here listening in on this right?”

“Yes we know, we were ignoring you but then we thought it’s your birthday so might as well make you happy.” Emily replied to him in a humorous way.

“I’ll be right back.” Justin said. And then he walked into the kitchen.

Emily and Tekara just sat there and watched to see what other people were doing. Until Tekara said, “I thought you were already here because I thought that girl over there was you.” She said pointing to a girl that looked so similar to Emily.

“At first I thought you were angry at me for making you do all that work, but then I realized and remembered that you didn’t do that much work and you’re not the type of person to get mad like that. Plus the robe, you weren’t wearing the robe that you’re wearing now.”

The girl he had short brown hair to her shoulders, a yellow long sleeved robe, brown boots, blue eyes, light skin, average body build and purple necklace.

Tekara said, “speaking of witch, where is your staff? You bring it everywhere.”

“Oh, I left it at home, I’ll go get it.” Emily said getting up to leave and get her staff.

I hope you liked it.:D
 

Keyari

翼のエルフ
Joined
Jul 13, 2011
Location
Rivendell, Middle Earth
Great job Toboe, I really can't wait till the plot develops more! There was some errors, but nothing too serious. If you like, I'll PM you ideas and suggestions. ;)

Great job!
~Ki
 

Toboe

Melody Malone
Joined
Feb 14, 2011
Location
Mars
Sorry this is takeing a while but I'm really busy lately so it might take a while sorry :(
 

Toboe

Melody Malone
Joined
Feb 14, 2011
Location
Mars
Sorry again I got busy again I'm trying to find time to make the story:(
 

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