Do You Need to Have Something in Common with Your Friends?

[misskitten]

I just have to ask; am I weird to believe that friendships need to be built on having something in common? I mean, I know I'm a pretty weird person, but I don't think that particular opinion is that weird - or is it? I mean, yes, the most important part of friendship is having someone to trust, who will be there for you - but you should actually enjoy spending time with this person, too...

The reason I'm asking this is because every now and then I get the "will you be my friend?" message on this social media/dating site I'm part of. Now, I'm all for finding friends, but the people who typically ask me this usually have nothing in common with me or at the very least they give no indicator that they do. The ones I usually wind up bonding with are more the people who more speak my language (metaphorically, not actually), the people who contact me based on a shared interest and the conversation just naturally develop from there. So, am I just strange for viewing friendships that way?

 

[Wolf Sage]

In my opinion, yes. One thing that constitutes a good friendship is having some things in common with a person. You can talk to just about anyone, but not everyone you've talked to becomes your friend. It takes a certain 'something', whether it's shared interests and ideals, a similar upbringing, or even shared physical traits, to become [lifelong] friends with someone. The people who send you a friend request on social networks may find your profile picture to be appealing or something, but once they get to know you, they may find out that they're not so compatible with you at all.

 

[Mercedes]

I don't think you need to have loads of things in common, two people can get along just fine, but, I struggle to think what I'd talk to someone about if we had absolutely nothing in common. I mean, I still keep in contact with friends I've known since I was 10, if we had nothing in common the things we could talk about/laugh about would have exhausted themselves by the time I was 11! So yeah, I do need to have something in common with the other person I think.

 

[Akuhime-sama]

Yeah, I'd say you need at least SOME kind of common-ground. If not, then you really can't have much of a conversation, let alone a whole friendship.

Though, even if you have similar interests, that doesn't mean you can get along. You also need compatible personalities.
But compatible personalities on their own don't cut it either. You need both a common ground and compatible personalities.