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Things That Are on Your Mind

Uwu_Oocoo2

Pico picori!
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Feb 15, 2021
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Anywhere you're not
How on earth do adults make friends? Like, in school it's easy, everybody is trapped together all day just pick which people you like best and hang out with them. Do you guys just... walk up to random people? And be like "Ayo you look snazzy let's hang out"?? Are we expected to select lifelong friends while still in school??? It's so weird.
 

mαrkαsscoρ

Mr. SidleInYourDMs
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Joined
May 4, 2012
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American Wasteland
How on earth do adults make friends? Like, in school it's easy, everybody is trapped together all day just pick which people you like best and hang out with them. Do you guys just... walk up to random people? And be like "Ayo you look snazzy let's hang out"?? Are we expected to select lifelong friends while still in school??? It's so weird.
workplace or college I guess, or mutuals?
there's definitely a reason why nearly all my current friends are from high school or lower still
 

Morbid Minish

Spooky Scary Skeleton.
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Oct 1, 2016
How on earth do adults make friends? Like, in school it's easy, everybody is trapped together all day just pick which people you like best and hang out with them. Do you guys just... walk up to random people? And be like "Ayo you look snazzy let's hang out"?? Are we expected to select lifelong friends while still in school??? It's so weird.
I'm not the best person to talk on this matter, but a big one is jobs. And meeting people through other friends. I've met a ton of people in my life through my best friend because she's more outgoing than me.
 

TheGreatCthulhu

The Great Old One, Star Spawn, Sleeper of R'lyeh
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How on earth do adults make friends? Like, in school it's easy, everybody is trapped together all day just pick which people you like best and hang out with them. Do you guys just... walk up to random people? And be like "Ayo you look snazzy let's hang out"?? Are we expected to select lifelong friends while still in school??? It's so weird.
I know this seems like a platitude, but it works for me.

I literally just be myself, raw, and unvarnished, because I also am pretty quiet and keep to myself most of the time.

I'd rather someone have a friendship with the real me, not a cardboard facsimile of me.

That said, for my job, I kinda have to make connections with people, so I have to force myself to be a little outgoing, and this is why I always carry a lighter in my show bag even though I quit smoking a long time ago.
 

Dio

~ It's me, Dio!~
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England
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Absolute unit
How on earth do adults make friends? Like, in school it's easy, everybody is trapped together all day just pick which people you like best and hang out with them. Do you guys just... walk up to random people? And be like "Ayo you look snazzy let's hang out"?? Are we expected to select lifelong friends while still in school??? It's so weird.
Adults don't tend to have as many friends generally as they don't often have time for them or for making new ones. Most have their established friendship groups already. The most lasting friendships seem to be from school and university. Sometimes you can make work friends but just because people do the same job doesn't mean they are compatible as friends.

That said I actually made quite a good amount of friends in adult life although I have a few from school left who I still hang with. If you do any activity or hobby that other people do you might make friends through it. I do the gym for instance. I'm quite large and lift heavy weights so people notice me and come up to talk to me and if you ask people for a spot then you can also get talking to them that way.

If you get a boyfriend or girlfriend you can probably have some of their friends as well if they are popular
 

Dio

~ It's me, Dio!~
Joined
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Location
England
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Absolute unit
That said, for my job, I kinda have to make connections with people, so I have to force myself to be a little outgoing, and this is why I always carry a lighter in my show bag even though I quit smoking a long time ago
I only have the occasional shisha these days and don't use cigs myself but I also carry a lighter with me everywhere so I can help people light up if they ask. Have had some great convos that way. I had really fancy arc lighter at one point which was a great conversation starter.
 

TheGreatCthulhu

The Great Old One, Star Spawn, Sleeper of R'lyeh
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Jan 22, 2016
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Male
So, a weight has been lifted off my shoulders, stress is gone.

So we fired our bass player. Long story short, the only qualification he had to play bass was that he owned a $50 POS special bass, combined with his unprofessional behavior.

So we fired him, and one of my good friends who's a serious go getter on the bass, he has great technique, great musical ear, and is a stand up dude stepped up to the plate, and now I couldn't be happier that the drama is done and over with, and it's about the music again.

And it's my beautiful wife's birthday! All in all, today was a good day. Dropping dead weight, making music with good people, and my wife turns 30. It's been a solid 5 months since I've felt this happy. ^_^
 
Joined
Apr 16, 2021
How on earth do adults make friends? Like, in school it's easy, everybody is trapped together all day just pick which people you like best and hang out with them. Do you guys just... walk up to random people? And be like "Ayo you look snazzy let's hang out"?? Are we expected to select lifelong friends while still in school??? It's so weird.
It is a lot harder to make friends after school, but one thing you could do is go to meetups/conventions for people with similar interests. Pretty much all my current irl friends were met through school and work, but I did meet one at a smash tourney, so if you talk around with groups of people that you already know share an interest with you it can be easier to connect with them
If you get a boyfriend or girlfriend you can probably have some of their friends as well if they are popular
Imagine going to your partner like "hey bro, mind if I have some of your friends?"
 

TheGreatCthulhu

The Great Old One, Star Spawn, Sleeper of R'lyeh
ZD Legend
Joined
Jan 22, 2016
Location
United States of America
Gender
Male
I only have the occasional shisha these days and don't use cigs myself but I also carry a lighter with me everywhere so I can help people light up if they ask. Have had some great convos that way. I had really fancy arc lighter at one point which was a great conversation starter.
Even if it's just some random stranger, that's a connection you've now made.

And, in my line of work, ya never know. It could be a promoter, event coordinator, sound guy, who knows. :)
 
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