Hello, friends! Here I am once again with a new update. This will officially be the last content update for The Hero of Spirits. This is a special chapter I've wanted to write for years, and I've finally gone and done it. Throughout the story, Alphonse has talked about how he values life and is not proud of having to kill people, but I've never really explored what made him come to feel so strongly about that. That would be the purpose of this special chapter; it tells the story of the first time Alphonse killed another person. I hope you all enjoy reading about it.
“At last, we’re out of there!”
I couldn’t have felt more relieved to be saying those words. The exhaustion dragged my feet down with every step. My disheveled brown hair had a few leftover twigs and leaves in it. My tired golden eyes could barely muster a gleam of joy as I stared out at the expansive fields and woods of the Forest Realm.
“It’s about time. I’m so glad to be out of these mountains.” the light blue Forest Fairy that accompanied me sighed. “I am NEVER listening to your directions again.”
“Are you still on about that? I swear this wasn’t my fault, Zelda!” I said.
“Oh, please! We were stuck up here for a whole week! All because you had to follow that blupee...”
“Well, blupees are good luck! Of course I wanted to follow it!”
“Good luck?! We barely made it out of there alive! So many Moblins...” Zelda shuddered. “Oh, speaking of which, you still have some Moblin blood on your shirt.”
I looked to where Zelda was indicating. Indeed, there was dried blood on my right sleeve. It was difficult for me to tell it was blood, at first. The white of my jacket was quite sullied by dirt and grime. I wanted to get to a town and wash my clothes properly as soon as possible.
“You’re right. Man, rivers really just don’t do the trick.” I said.
“They don’t do the trick for bathing, either.” Zelda laughed.
“... Not funny.”
The two of us began to descend the mountainside together. In the distance, we could see a large city in a wide open plain. The city was encircled by a great wall, and a tall castle stood at its heart.
“Hey, I think that’s Hyleigh City down there.” I said.
“Oh, yeah, could be.” Zelda said. “I don’t think we’ve ever gone there since we started traveling together last year.”
“Yeah, I don’t think so, either.” I said. “Well, there’s a first time for everything!”
As I walked through the trees on the steep mountainside, I glanced over at the bloodstain on my sleeve again. I was usually more careful about getting monster blood on my clothes, but the past week had been pretty rough.
Zelda could tell I was eyeing it. “Is that stain bothering you, Alphonse?” she asked.
“A little. I want to wash it out quickly.” I answered.
“I get you. It must be tough for you, huh? You’ve had to kill a lot of monsters in our travels.” she said.
“Yeah, I guess so.” I said, my mind beginning to wander.
This was the first time it occurred to me, but she was right. I really had slain my fair share of monsters. I didn’t really ever dwell on it much before. Now that Zelda had said that, I realized I never really thought much about killing them. They were monsters, after all.
When those words ran through my mind, I felt something irk at me in the pit of my stomach. It was an unpleasant feeling. However, I pushed that feeling away quickly. I was too tired to think about it at the moment. I just wanted to get to Hyleigh City and rest. After all, I was just a thirteen year old kid. Such heavy subjects weren’t any of my business... were they?
Special Chapter
The Weight of Life
The sun was rather high in the sky when Zelda and I arrived at the front gates of Hyleigh City. Just from there, we could tell that the capital city was enormous. The main road that led into the city was absolutely bustling. It appeared as if there were a sea of people flooding the streets. Some looked like merchants, others wore soldier’s armor and carried spears, and others looked like civilians going about their business. The buildings that lined the road were tall, but not as tall as the wall that surrounded the city. This was my first time here, and I was feeling overwhelmed.
“Wow... I’ve never seen a city this big before.” I said.
“And this is just the main road...” Zelda added.
I felt myself involuntarily swallow. I was born in a tiny seaside village, and spent a lot of time in a bigger but still small woodland village after that. They felt like the boonies compared to this place. I didn’t think I’d fit in here at all. However, my mind returned to the dirt and filth that coated my body and clothes, and my apprehension vanished. My desire to be clean again easily overpowered my nervousness.
“Come on, let’s find a bathhouse fast.” I said.
Zelda and I took our first steps on the cobblestone road. The further we walked into the city, the noisier it got. The sound of hustle and bustle filled our ears and began to make us dizzy. After a week of being lost in the mountains, such a drastic scenery change was unsettling. What was worse, people were beginning to stare at us. But, who could blame them? A filthy child and a fairy wandering the streets together was an odd sight.
Feeling their stares burn holes into my back, I quickly searched the streets for signs that pointed us to a bathhouse. It wasn’t long before I spotted one. It read “Stock Pot Bathhouse” and pointed us down a branching road. Zelda and I followed this road as quickly as we could, avoiding the odd stares of the townspeople. After a handful of yards, we discovered the place nestled on the side of the street between residences.
Entering the building through the sliding doors, we found ourselves in a comfortable lobby. The floorboards creaked beneath our feet as we cautiously approached the front desk. Sitting behind the desk was a woman who looked to be in her late twenties. She had red hair and green eyes, and she looked rather preoccupied. When she noticed us, she put on her customer service face and opened her mouth to speak. However, seeing how filthy I was made her stumble over her words.
“Good afternoon! Welcome to the- ...! The, um... Stock Pot Bathhouse!” she said, trying her best to keep a straight face.
“How much for a bath and to wash my clothes?” I asked, trying my best to ignore her judgmental look.
“Um... That’ll be 50 rupees.” she said.
I handed her the money and quickly entered through the door marked by a sign that said “Men’s Bath”. Zelda stayed where she was in the lobby. After all, it would be rude for her to enter the men’s bath, being a lady.
I entered the changing room and saw that I was the only person there. Feeling a little relieved by this, I stripped off my filthy clothes and hurriedly jumped into the bath. As soon as my skin touched the hot water, my exhaustion from the past week melted away. I hadn’t felt such bliss in quite a while. It felt like I was coming back to life with every second that passed. I indulged myself a little and took my time scrubbing off the dirt and mess I’d picked up in the mountains.
* * *
After cleaning myself off and washing my clothes, I felt like a brand new person again. I was feeling very chipper. Zelda giggled to see me so happy about a bath. The next thing on our list was to find some food. We took a walk through the streets of Hyleigh City and found a small cafe.
The building was small, but it was very cozy-looking. There was an outdoor terrace, which was where Zelda and I took a seat. It was full of many potted plants and flowers. I wondered if the owner had a thing for plants. It wasn’t long before we were given a menu. Our server’s name tag read “Kafei”, and I wondered if he intentionally got a job at a cafe or if it was just a coincidence.
After ordering food and drink, I felt even more replenished than before. I felt like I had all my strength back at last. While paying for the meal and leaving, I had a spring in my step. It was hard for Zelda to miss it.
“I’m glad you’re feeling so much better.” she said.
“Thanks! I haven’t felt this good in so long...” I said joyfully.
“That’s good!” Zelda fluttered up and down happily. “Now then, what should we do next?”
“Well, this is our first time here. The crowd is beginning to grow on me a bit.” I said. “Wanna take some more time to look around the city?”
“Sure thing! Sounds like fun!” Zelda said.
She seemed pretty excited. This was just as new for her as it was for me. When we first partnered up, we knew that most of our experiences would be new for both of us. I felt pretty happy to be sharing this one with her.
As we walked through the streets, a sudden commotion drew our attention. This wasn’t the usual city noise we were growing used to. It sounded as if there were shouting and screams mixed in. Zelda and I exchanged a worried look and rushed to see what was going on. As we came up on the main street, we got an answer that neither of us expected.
A group of horses drawing a wagon dashed through the streets. Men wearing black tunics and carrying swords and maces rode them, urging the steeds to gallop faster. On the cart were what appeared to be bags and boxes. One of them was hanging open, and I could swear I saw a glint of gold. Far behind this group was a battalion of soldiers, trying to pursue on foot but stuck behind the gathering crowd of people. They seemed to be pretty desperate to reach the group of men on horseback.
“Whoa, what is this, a robbery getaway?!” Zelda said in shock.
I didn’t answer her. I didn’t have much going through my head at the time, but one thing I did know for certain was that I couldn’t stand by and watch. I sprinted off after them as fast as my feet could carry me.
It didn’t do much good to chase men who were riding horses on foot. I wasn’t having any better luck than the soldiers behind me. However, I could see that the main road was coming up on a turn up ahead. I remembered that this turn would soon take them straight to the front gate of the city.
I knew I couldn’t let them get that far. As Zelda was catching up to me, calling my name, I quickly turned on my heel and dashed into the alleyways. I thought I could catch up to them if I cut through the neighborhood that the main road curved around. I ran past garbage cans and under clothes lines. I sprinted up stairs, and hopped between walls until I reached the rooftops. Jumping from roof to roof, I had a good view of the escaping thugs. They were coming around the turn just as I started my rooftop run.
“Alphonse, hold on!” Zelda said, finally gaining on me. “What are you trying to do?!”
“I’m gonna stop them so the soldiers can catch them!” I said, continuing to run.
“What?! That’s dangerous! Wait!”
Her pleas fell on deaf ears as I slid down the roof of a house close to the main road. I leapt off the building, aiming for the group of thugs that was finally starting to pass me by. They appeared shocked to see a kid flying through the air at them. I landed on the cart, and drew my sword.
“That’s far enough!” I shouted.
After staring at me for a moment, the thugs just threw their heads back and laughed.
“Ha! What do you think you’re playing at, kid?” said one.
“Go home to mommy before you get hurt.” said another.
Feeling irritated that they weren’t taking me seriously, I used my sword and tried to cut one of the ropes the cart was tied to. The thugs stop laughing and became angry. One of them leapt off his horse and onto the cart. He easily kicked me off the cart and onto the street, and hopped down himself.
“I’ll deal with this little wise-ass. Y’all go on ahead.” he said to his friends.
The rest of the thugs agreed and continued to ride away. They passed through the front gate and disappeared into the forest. I was frustrated that they had escaped, but now I had bigger problems to deal with.
“You shoulda run when you had the chance, punk.” the thug growled, drawing his sword.
I felt my blood turn to ice. The man’s intent was clearly seen in his eyes. He was going to kill me.
- Oh, man... This is for real, isn’t it?
This was my first time face to face with another person in battle. Sure, I had fought plenty of monsters before, but never another human. And this one was twice my size and out for blood.
“Alphonse! Run!” Zelda shouted as she arrived.
It was too late for that. The man was already lunging for me. He swung his sword straight down at me. I barely regained my composure in time to block his strike. The weight of his sword was too much for my arms to bear, and he knocked me to the ground. I retained my grip on my sword, but I was quite shaken from the blow.
The man’s eyes showed no concern for me. There was no hesitation, no wavering. He did not even give a thought to the fact that I was a child. It was clear from the way he moved. He was not going to let me walk away from this.
- ****, he’s really going to kill me!
I recalled something that Rena, my foster parent, said to me while training me in swordplay. She told me my sword was my life, and to never let it go. As long as I held it, I could live.
- As long as I hold my sword, I can live...
These words drove me to stand back up. I did not want to die. I had to fight to get away from this man. I looked up at him, and he was preparing another powerful strike. I watched his sword carefully, and when I learned the angle of his swing, I dipped forward. His weapon cleaved through the air, almost taking a hair off the top of my head. After ducking under his sword, I took a swipe at his chest, being careful to not let my sword dig too deep into his skin.
“Gaugh!” he coughed. “You little ****!”
The sight of his blood made me choke up. This was human blood. Blood that I drew from another person. As my skin clammed up and a knot formed in my stomach, I lost my focus. The man took advantage of this to deliver a fierce punch to my jaw. I hit the road harder than before, and felt dazed. My face ached painfully, and blood dripped from my lip. Meanwhile, the man brandished his sword and took another step toward me.
I just wanted to cut him so he’d back off. But he didn't. He still came at me. He wasn’t going to stop. In fact, he looked like he wanted to kill me more than ever. I thought I heard Zelda shout my name, but my head was still hazy. I could only lay on the ground, shaking. The man loomed over me, holding his sword above his head.
My heart pounded fiercely in my chest. My head was spinning. My skin was ice. My eyes were fixed on the blade that was going to bring my life to an end. I was going to be killed by another human being. Why? Why another human? The Great War was raging on, so why, at such a time, was this man doing this? Why did things have to be like this?
The man’s sword began to fall.
Zelda’s voice barely reached my ears.
My heart stopped beating.
In that moment, I heard Rena’s voice, deep in my subconscious.
“Live.”
I felt a splash on my cheek. I turned my eyes to look at it. It was blood. I returned my gaze to look up. The man’s face was inches from my own. His eyes were empty. I looked down to his chest. My sword had pierced through his gut. His blood spilled all over my clothes, and covered my hand that had forced my blade into his chest.
As the realization of what I’d just done came over me, I felt all the air leave my body. I tried to let out a scream, but no sound came out. I panicked and pushed the man off of my sword. He fell to the ground beside me, lifeless. Blood continued to pour from his wound, dying the cobblestone bricks red.
I stared at my sword. Its blade was covered in the man’s blood. My hand began to tremble as my breath finally returned to me. I panted harder and harder as I stared at the crimson color that stained my hand. It wasn’t long before I finally let out a scream. It was a short-lived scream, as I nearly vomited in the middle of it. All that came out was spit, but it burned my throat and made my eyes water.
“Alphonse...” Zelda said, finally speaking up. “You... You just...”
She didn’t need to finish her sentence. I knew full well what she was going to say.
I just killed someone. I just killed another human being.
The sound of marching feet drew our attention away from the dead man. The soldiers had finally arrived, much too late. They looked upon the scene in shock. Some of them whispered among themselves, wondering how they should handle such a situation. However, one of them stepped forward. He appeared to be their captain. He was a tall man with strong features. The blue eyes peering out from under his helmet looked incredibly sad.
“Well, this is quite a shock. I never imagined we would meet again like this.” he said to me.
I didn’t answer him. I merely looked up at him, confused. I couldn’t recall meeting this person before. Why did he know me? I was too out of sorts to try to think about it.
“It looks like you don’t remember me... I can understand that. You were pretty young at the time.” the soldier said. “But, I could never forget the little boy who saved my life in the forest all those years ago, Alphonse.”
When he said that, the memory came back in a rush. When I was seven years old, I found a wounded soldier in the forest and brought him to Rena for treatment. In doing so, I saved his life. I recalled his name, at last.
“... You’re Abel.” I said.
“That’s right. So you remembered.” he said. “To think this is how we meet again... You poor kid.”
Abel knelt down and patted my head. It didn’t make me feel any better. I looked back at the dead man’s body again, and my eyes began to well up with tears.
“Abel... I... I...” I started to say.
“I know. It’s going to be alright. You survived. That’s what matters.” Abel said. He then grabbed my arm and pulled me to my feet. “Come on, let’s get you to the guard house. You need some time to process this.”
I didn’t answer him. I kept staring at the dead man in silence. Zelda didn’t seem to understand what was going on between us, but she spoke up all the same.
“Let’s listen to him, Alphonse. You’ll be okay, I know it.”
I finally looked away from the dead man. “Alright.” I said, keeping my eyes on the ground.
* * *
Time felt like it passed by slowly. I sat in the guard house of Hyleigh City, in a room that was made for visitors or witnesses to feel comfortable. I was given fresh new clothes and allowed to wash up. The man’s blood was gone, but I could still feel it, as if it had stained my very being.
Zelda floated around my head in circles. She appeared to be trying to think of something to say that could make me feel better. I had a glass of water on the table in front of me, sitting untouched. I stared at this glass, lost in thought.
Thoughts of what I had done tore me up inside. Every time I closed my eyes, the man’s lifeless face appeared. The vacant look in his eyes, the blood spilling from his body, the blood covering my sword and my hand... I couldn’t get any of it out of my head. But why?
I had killed numerous monsters before without a problem. Fighting them and cutting them apart was a frequent occurrence in my travels. So why was this different? Was it because I killed another human? If so, what made killing humans different from killing monsters? Did I really value monsters so little that I could take their lives without a second thought? What kind of person did that make me?
These thoughts continued to swim around in my head, making me dizzy and upset. If killing monsters was the same as killing humans, I would be a mass murderer. Yet, I had felt no guilt or shame about it until now. How awful I must be, to think so little of their lives. They were living beings, after all. And what of the animals I would sometimes hunt for food? Did I not value their lives, either? It just didn’t end. My thoughts jumped from one extreme to the next, questioning my morality with every new spin. I was beginning to feel like I would pass out.
I wanted nothing more than to forget about this, but wouldn’t doing so make me even worse of a person? Didn’t I owe it to all the lives I took to think about this? Or was I just needlessly punishing myself? I had no idea what I should do or how I should look at this. No matter how hard I thought about it, I couldn’t come up with anything.
Zelda could see my expression become increasingly stressed, and she fluttered frantically above my head. She seemed desperate to find something to say, yet still careful not to speak clumsily and upset me further. She was being quite considerate to give it such careful thought, but even I was beginning to wish she would just get something out already.
Just then, the door opened. Abel walked in, carrying a warm roll of bread for me.
“You haven’t had anything to drink yet?” he asked, seeing that the water he left me earlier remained untouched.
“He hasn’t said a word this entire time...” Zelda said, finally speaking. “I’ve been trying to think, but I have no idea what to say...”
“You sound like a very considerate friend, little fairy. That’s good. He’s gonna need your kindness to get through this.” Abel said. “It’s not an easy thing to live with, killing another person. Especially for a kid so young...”
It sounded like he was talking from experience. Finally, I raised my head to look at him. If Abel knew what he was talking about, maybe he could give an answer. Maybe he could finally quiet the whirling thoughts in my head.
“Abel... Have you ever killed someone before?” I asked him.
Zelda seemed surprised by my question, but she didn’t speak. Abel looked to be rather saddened.
“That’s a heavy subject for a kid like you... But, it seems like you need to hear this. Very well.”
After placing the bread roll in front of me, Abel pulled over a chair and sat across the table from me. He looked like he was preparing himself for our coming conversation. I found myself hoping he would be as blunt as possible. I desperately wanted answers.
“To answer your question...” he began. “Yes. I have killed people. Many of them.”
I felt myself inhale sharply when hearing him say this. I got the blunt answer I was looking for. “So... What was it like for you? Did it make your head hurt this much?” I asked.
“Make my head hurt, huh... That’s one way to put it.” he said. “Yeah, I was very conflicted about it, myself. One thing that most people generally accept as common sense is to not kill each other...
Most people. There are always those people who think nothing of killing others if they gain something from it. I became a soldier to protect people like you from people like them. Guess today I didn’t do my job very well...”
“Have you ever... gotten used to it?” I asked.
“Of course not. Killing people isn’t something you get used to, if you have any sense of morality. The fact that you're asking such a question and thinking so hard on it tells me you’ve got a very kind heart, Alphonse.” Abel said.
I felt disappointed after hearing that. He was essentially telling me that this feeling wouldn’t go away. “So, then... What should I do? How do I live with this?” I asked.
“That’s something you have to figure out for yourself.” he said. “Taking lives is a judgment call. It’s all about how you weigh their lives and make the decision. For me, I weigh the lives of innocent people against the lives of those who would harm them, and I decide that the innocent people’s lives are worth more. If I have to kill someone to save someone else, then so be it. That’s what I decided not long after I became a soldier and killed someone for the first time. You might come upon a similar answer, or you may find a completely different answer. That part is entirely up to you. But I promise you, you will come upon an answer someday.”
I took in everything he had said to me. In that moment, or rather, every time I took another life, was I weighing them? Did I weigh them against my own life and decide mine was more important than theirs? Was that selfish of me?
Rena’s words came back to me once again.
“Live.” She wanted me to live my life for the sake of living, and I didn’t want to die, naturally. Was killing in self defense just something that sometimes had to be done? It was true that most times that I had killed monsters, it was because they were attacking me. Was killing to preserve my own life not something selfish, but something necessary?
Abel could tell I was still twisted up inside. “Well, I don’t think I can say anything more to help you. But perhaps I can offer you something else that might.” he said.
I perked up. “What do you mean?”
“We identified the man you killed, and we know places where he and his buddies like to hide out. Would you like to come with us and help us recover what they stole?” Abel offered.
“What? You want me to come with you?” I said in shock.
“Yes. Both you and your fairy friend.”
“Huh?! Me too?” Zelda said.
“If you come with us and see how we deal with our own conflicts, it might help you find an answer to deal with yours. Of course, I do owe you for saving my life all those years ago, so think of this as my repayment.” Abel said.
I thought about this for a minute. It was obvious that Abel was expecting me to fight alongside him. I had to question his sanity to allow a thirteen year old boy to accompany fully trained soldiers on a dangerous mission. But, it was as he said, this might be the cure for my conflict. I wanted an answer. I wanted to know how to weigh life. And I would be helping to catch criminals at the same time. That was the reason I chased after those men in the first place.
“Alright. I’ll go with you.” I said.
“Alphonse?! Are you sure?” Zelda asked.
“Yes. This is something I have to do. I can feel it.”
Zelda could see the look in my eyes, and knew that I needed this. “Okay, fine. I’ll go with you. Like Abel said, I’m gonna be here for you.”
“Thank you. I’m glad you’re with me, Zelda.” I said, finally giving her a faint smile.
I grabbed the roll of bread and bit into it. I grabbed the glass of water with my other hand and barely let myself swallow the bread before I started gulping it down. I would need all my strength for this.
Abel watched me eat, and smiled to himself. “Maybe this’ll help to repay her, too...”
* * *
As the sun began to set, I rode on a horse out of the capital city with Abel’s battalion. Zelda kept pace with me in the air. She seemed nervous, but she didn’t try to change my mind about doing this. Abel’s soldiers were skeptical about my presence. It seemed they thought I was going to be more of a hindrance than anything else, but they obeyed Abel’s orders all the same.
We made camp for the night in the forest. In the morning we were going to search the first hideout location the soldiers were aware of. It was said to be an abandoned Lizalfos fortress. The intelligence was that bandits had forced the Lizalfos out, claiming it for themselves.
As we sat around the fire, soup was passed around to everyone. I had my fair share. Zelda was offered soup, and she had to explain that fairies don’t eat. Most of the soldiers let me and Zelda be, not talking to us or even really glancing at us. I felt fairly alienated. I could hear them discussing strategies of how to approach the fort, and what they would do if the thieves were there.
It was at this point that it occurred to me that I had never asked what the thieves had stolen. I assumed it was gold, but there seemed to be an awful lot of soldiers here for something like that. I walked over to Abel and asked him about it.
“Ah, yeah, I didn’t tell you yet, did I?” he said. “The thieves stole gold and a precious artifact from the royal family.”
I was incredulous. “
The royal family?! They actually stole from King Dereveaux?”
“That’s right. They broke into the castle and made off with a few bags of gold. But, what’s worse is that they also stole an extremely valuable ancient artifact; the Spirit Flute.” he said.
“Spirit Flute?” Zelda asked. “An instrument?”
“It’s not just any instrument. As the name suggests, it’s a very precious and ceremonial flute. It was given to the first king of Hyleigh by one of the Lokomo, the servants of the Spirits of Light themselves. It was played in prayers and offerings by the court musician for centuries. And now that we’re in the middle of the Great War, something like that is more important that ever, even as just a symbol.”
Now I could see why they sent so many soldiers to go after the thieves. With the Spirits being locked in battle with the Demon King, prayers to them had become more frequent. The royal family would want to use the Spirit Flute now more than ever. I couldn’t believe anyone would steal such an important artifact. Like Abel had said earlier, these people must have only been thinking about what they could gain from it.
After our talk, I went back to where I had been sitting. I laid down in the damp grass as Zelda hovered over me. I glanced over at my sword, given to me by Rena. Tomorrow, I was going to use this sword to fight other humans. I had to prepare myself for that. I had to learn how to weigh the lives of other people. I felt like I owed it to myself to do this.
“Alphonse.” Zelda began. “Whatever you end up having to do tomorrow, I want you to know something.” I looked up at her. “When we met, you killed Stalchildren to save me. I will always be grateful to you for that. You chose to take lives to save mine back then, and I’m alive today because of it. I think you made the right choice to do that. So, if you end up having to make choices like that again tomorrow, I want you to trust that you’ll make the right ones. You’re a good person, and I believe in you.”
It seemed like she finally figured out something to say. I was really touched by her words. I gave her a warm smile and nodded up at her. She seemed to be happy that she said something that helped me, and floated down into the grass next to me. It was time for us to rest now. Tomorrow, I was going to be ready.
* * *
The sun had barely begun peeking through the trees when we arrived at the fort. It was deep in the forest. The trees here were tall and their leaves formed a canopy over the clearing where the fort was housed. It was built from weathered gray brick, covered in moss and vines from its years here in the wilderness. A few patches of sunlight lazily shined their way around the fort through the canopy of leaves.
It was deathly silent. Zelda, Abel, his soldiers, and myself were hidden among the brush surrounding the fort. I could hear the rhythmic breathing of the soldiers, pacing themselves, getting ready to leap into action at a moment’s notice. I felt a pang of anxiety well up. I was uncertain of what would be happening soon.
I heard Abel’s voice whisper to us. “It’s risky to approach the fort. If they’re there, they’ll easily spot us coming. That’s where you come in, miss fairy.”
“Huh?! What do you want me to do?” Zelda asked.
“You’re small and quick. You’re perfect for a stealthy peek at that fort. Do you think you can check it out without being seen?” he asked.
“I...” Zelda seemed uncertain. She turned to me, and I gave her an encouraging nod. “... Okay. I’ll give it a shot. I’ll come right back if they’re in there.”
“Good. We’re counting on you.” he said.
Zelda seemed to shake a little, but she soon darted over to the fort as quick as she could. It wasn’t long before she had disappeared inside. All we could do now was wait for her.
I felt anxious about Zelda going in alone. Sure, she was quick, but what if she got cornered? If she didn’t come back, I didn’t know what I would do with myself. She would have gotten killed because she came along with me for my own selfish reasons. Abel could sense that I was worried about her, and he put a caring hand on my shoulder.
After what felt like the longest five minutes of my life, we soon saw her light blue glow again. She flew out of an opening on the right side of the building and found her way back to us. She seemed very excited.
“Guys! They’re in there!” she said. “A whole bunch of them!”
All of us let out a breath upon hearing this. This was really happening. I felt myself getting tensed up.
“Do you know exactly how many?” Abel asked.
“No, but I’m certain there’s at least twice as many as the group that escaped Hyleigh City yesterday.” she reported.
“Did any of them see you?”
“Nope! They also seemed pretty relaxed. I don’t think they expected us to find them this fast. I didn’t really see any lookouts or anything. I think it’s safe for us to approach the fort.”
“I see. Thank you very much, Zelda.” Abel then turned to the rest of us. “I want us to split into groups of five and enter from all directions. We do this slow and quiet, and we might be able to mount a surprise attack. I want at least two men at each exit, as well, to make sure none of them escape.”
“Yes, sir!” all the soldiers replied in unison.
Four groups of five were formed. Zelda and I found ourselves with Abel and two other soldiers. There was one exit on each of the four sides of the building. My group entered from the right, where Zelda had come from. Two men stayed behind at each exit, just as Abel ordered. Looking up at the fort, I could sense the battle that was about to begin and the blood that was about to be shed. After forcing away an involuntary shiver, I took a deep breath as I followed behind Abel and the two soldiers inside.
The hallway was dimly lit by torches here and there, and dirt and moss littered the floor and walls. A damp and musty scent tickled our noses and made breathing feel like a chore. We walked with care to avoid any echoes of our footsteps. Abel peered around the first corner to make sure it was clear, then signaled for us to follow. We crept up a flight of stairs and did the same thing again. We were getting deeper into the fort with each hallway we traversed.
Soon enough, we began to hear voices. Abel signaled for us to stop, and we listened intently. The voices came from a room down the hall from us a few feet. I could barely make out what they were saying.
“Yeah, I just sent Gray out to discuss a price for the Spirit Flute.”
“Who’s the broker?”
“Some punk named Vino or whatever. I think he’s still small time right now. I don’t have much hopes for this deal.”
I couldn’t make out much from what I heard, but I was certain the name “Spirit Flute” was mentioned at some point. Abel was farther ahead than the rest of us, so I thought that perhaps he could hear them more clearly. He looked back at us, and nodded. We were going to attack soon.
This was it. The moment was about to be upon us. A real battle against human adversaries. I felt a pit grow in my stomach, but I tried my best to ignore it. This was what I had to do. I reassured myself of that, and placed my hand on the hilt of my sword.
As we inched down the hall, closer to the room where the thieves waited, Zelda shouted.
“Alphonse! Behind you!”
I flinched in surprise, but quickly turned on my heel and drew my sword. I thought that perhaps one of the thieves had gotten the drop on us, but that wasn’t the case. My blade clashed with a machete, and I was struck with shock to see that it belonged to not a human, but a Lizalfos.
“What the?!” one of the soldiers gasped as he turned around.
“Hey, who’s there?!” shouted the thieves from inside the room up ahead.
I heard Abel click his tongue in frustration as he drew his sword. Two thieves appeared in the hallway, and were surprised to see the scene that laid out before them.
“Why you-!” one of them began to say.
He had barely gotten two words out before a spear impaled him through his stomach from behind. His buddy yelped in shock at the discovery of a second Lizalfos behind him. We were surrounded; both us and the thieves.
The Lizalfos I locked blades with was fairly bigger than me. Its reptilian face was staring at me unnervingly. Blueish scales were exposed between the gaps of its armor. Its long tail flicked back and forth behind it, and its snake-like tongue hissed from between pointed teeth. I could easily sense its bloodlust.
It began to apply more pressure to its weapon, and I felt myself being forced back. I began sliding my blade down the length of its own until I was able to switch places with it. It made an odd gurgling sound as it reared its arm back, preparing to strike at me again. Its movements were easy to predict. As it swung its blade, I swung with my own to counter its blow. Its machete was knocked up, and I jabbed my sword through an opening in its armor.
The monster cried out in pain as it backed up, and was met with a spear through the chest from behind, courtesy of one of the soldiers. Meanwhile, further down the hall, the other Lizalfos had already killed the other thief, and was now grappling with Abel.
Abel dipped past swift spear strikes, and easily cut through the spear’s wooden grip with his sword. The Lizalfos had lost its weapon, and let out a frightened cry as Abel deftly cut it down. His technique was admirable, with no wasted movements to speak of.
“Damn it, where did these things come from?” one of the soldiers complained.
“They must be trying to reclaim their fort from the thieves. Bad timing for us.” Abel said calmly. “This simply means there are more enemies than we thought. Our job hasn’t changed.”
“Yes, sir!” the soldiers replied with a salute.
I was impressed with how adaptable Abel was to this situation. I was becoming more nervous, though. I gazed down at the dead Lizalfos and thieves, and wondered if I would have to kill soon, too.
I thought about the weight of their lives in this situation. The soldiers and Abel decided their lives were worth taking to keep themselves alive and to finish their mission. Would I be able to take a life for a reason like that? I supposed that’s what I came here to find out.
We continued on down the hall and checked the room where the thieves had been. None of the stolen loot was in there, so we moved on. After heading up another flight of stairs and around another bend, we discovered the bodies of two thieves, a soldier, and a Lizalfos.
“Bastards got one of ours...” Abel cursed.
He and the soldiers stopped to send a quick prayer to the Spirits of Light for their fallen comrade. I did the same quietly, though I didn’t know his name. Just as they were finishing up, though, more Lizalfos appeared behind us.
“Watch out!” I said, alerting the others.
I dashed down the hall to meet them in combat. The first one tried to jab at me with a spear, but I was easily able to duck past it. I grabbed the wooden grip with my hand and yanked the creature forward a bit. I cut the spear with my sword as it was off balance, and allowed my sword to pierce its hide before it could regain its composure. It was dead before it hit the floor. The one behind it became angry and screeched at me in a fit of rage.
It lunged forward with a rusty broadsword, and I parried its strike. I swung my sword down, and it parried that. We exchanged a few more blows before I was able to advance forward. Our swords grinded together, mine taking some of the rust off its own, and as we separated, I darted around behind it. I delivered a quick slash to its back, and it accompanied its ally in death.
I stood and gazed upon my handiwork, panting. Inside, I felt a knot in my gut over taking their lives. This feeling was new. Now that I was actually thinking about it, killing monsters did make me uncomfortable. I supposed that made me kind, like Abel said. The real test, however, would be if I had to kill a human again.
I looked up to see what Abel and the other two were doing, and was surprised to see that they were gone from sight.
“Huh? Where did the others go?” I said.
“Wait, what? Oh! Huh?! They’re gone!” Zelda said, just noticing their absence herself.
“How could we have gotten separated? They were right there a second ago...” I said.
“I don’t know... Maybe more enemies appeared while we were fighting and drew them away.” she said. “We’d better go find them, fast. They could be in trouble.”
Zelda and I stepped over the bodies of the Lizalfos and continued on. Soon enough, we came to a fork in the hallway. We listened, and heard sounds of a struggle down the hall to the left. We quickly made our way in that direction, and came upon a wide room with a chaotic scene.
This room was full of thieves and Lizalfos and soldiers, all fighting a three way battle. Each group was trying their hardest to kill the others. A thief cleaved through the body of a Lizalfos, only to be cut down by a soldier in the next moment. A soldier stabbed her spear through a Lizalfos, and was cut down by a thief before she could blink. The flow of the battle swayed back and forth like this continuously. No one was gaining any ground. It was a complete free-for-all.
“Wow, what a mess...” Zelda said. I couldn’t help but agree with her; this was a disaster.
Soon enough, I spotted Abel in this hectic sea of blood and bodies, trying his best to defend a group of wounded soldiers from a gang of Lizalfos. Some of the wounded were the two soldiers that had accompanied us. One of them looked like he wasn’t going to make it.
It wasn’t long before I was spotted. A thief made his way toward me, getting ready to strike, only to be stabbed to death from an incoming Lizalfos. This monster then turned its sights on me, and was ready to pounce when it was sliced apart by a soldier.
The soldier ran over to me. “Are you okay, kid?” she asked.
“Yeah. Thank you.” I said.
“Hey, watch out!” Zelda shouted.
The soldier turned around in time to block a thief’s blade from cutting into her. I circled around her and attacked the thief, cutting into his back. As he cried out in pain, the soldier finished him off with a sword in his gut.
“Thanks for the help. You fight well for a kid.” she said.
“Yeah...” I said, distracted.
I didn’t kill him myself, but the thief was dead with my help. I looked at his blood on my sword, and knew I was partly responsible for this. The knot in my stomach returned, stronger than ever before.
- No... It was to save that soldier’s life... I’m not a murderer...
As I was thinking this, I turned to face the battle. I saw that Abel was starting to get overwhelmed. He had just finished killing off the last Lizalfos when he was assailed by a band of thieves, without getting a moment to rest. I rushed into the fray, intending to come to his aid.
I dipped past a Lizalfos and a thief locked in battle, cutting into the Lizalfos’ back as I did so. I leapt over a dead thief and countered a Lizalfos’ sword strike from midair with a spinning swing. When my feet touched the ground, I ducked under its arm, ripping my blade through its hide as I ran past it. I locked blades with a thief that got in my way, and pushed him back. A quick swipe of my sword left him with a bloody face as he stumbled backwards. I darted around him, and I was finally upon the group that was surrounding Abel.
Now that I was closer, I could see that Abel and the wounded soldiers were also defending the stolen loot. It had been here in this room all along, and the thieves were desperately trying to reach it. Abel valiantly stood in their way, continuously parrying attacks from four thieves at once. His exhaustion was clearly showing on his face, though. No one could keep that up for long.
One of them turned around to see me, and left the others to deal with Abel as he attacked me. I parried a downward slice and jumped back to avoid a horizontal slash. Just then, the soldier I’d helped before appeared and slashed across his chest. The thief collapsed in a bloody heap, and two of his friends turned around to fight.
Another soldier ran over to join us. It looked like the chaotic battle had finally settled down. There were only the two soldiers with me left standing, besides Abel and the wounded. All of the Lizalfos were dead, and the only thieves left were the three we were fighting. This battle was coming to an end.
From between the two thieves locked in combat with the two soldiers, I saw the last thief successfully land a strike to Abel’s hand. His sword clattered to the ground as he cried out in pain. He fell to his rear, and held out his uninjured arm to defend the wounded soldiers in a final desperate act.
Abel appeared to be done for. The thief was readying the killing blow, and the two soldiers that could still fight were unable to help him. The thieves they were fighting were putting up too much resistance. They couldn’t end their battles fast enough to save their captain.
But, I was still there.
I ducked past the flailing swords and spears of the soldiers and thieves in my way. I brandished my sword, and gripped it hard. Just as the thief was bringing his blade down over Abel’s head, I cut into him.
The feedback was sharp. I felt my sword cut through bone as I slashed through his back. The blade went in deep, almost all the way through him. Blood sprayed from his wound, splashing my cheek and my shirt. At last, I could cleave no further through him, and my sword stopped. The man cried out in pain, dropping his weapon, and slumped back. I could feel his life escaping him through the hand that held the sword that impaled him. I felt every death rattle through the feedback of my weapon. I pulled out my sword, and more blood spurted from his wound onto the floor. I heard his last breath leave his body as he collapsed to the ground.
It happened. I had killed someone again, this time intentionally. And this time it was to save Abel’s life. As I looked down at this scene, I felt like I was going to vomit again. Just as Abel said, this wasn’t something a person could get used to. I felt the full weight of the man’s life on my shoulders. It was a suffocating feeling. I almost couldn’t breathe. I robbed him of his life and his future, because in that moment, I weighed his life against Abel’s, and decided Abel’s was worth more.
- So, this is what it means to weigh someone’s life...
Abel gazed up at me with a sad expression. “... That’s twice you’ve saved my life now. Thank you, Alphonse.”
He held out his hand to me. I hesitated for a moment, but I reached out and took it, pulling him to his feet. By this time, the two thieves that were left alive surrendered, and the two soldiers left standing had them at swordpoint. The battle was won. The enemy was routed, and the stolen goods were recovered. This was a victory, but far too many people had died for us to feel any satisfaction.
* * *
I straddled a horse on its way out of the forest. Zelda accompanied me as I rode next to Abel. We were on our way back to Hyleigh City. Our horses pulled a cart full of the recovered goods, including the Spirit Flute. The operation was a success, but at a great cost. Due to the Lizalfos incursion causing the battle to fall into chaos, Abel lost half of his soldiers. The eight he’d left outside the fort to guard the exits were ambushed by the Lizalfos, and only three survived. There were the two who remained standing in the last battle, and the seven wounded who managed to cling to life behind Abel. A total of twelve survivors out of twenty five, not including Abel.
It was a quiet and depressing ride back to the city. Zelda could tell I was still mulling over my own actions.
“Alphonse, how are you feeling?” she asked me.
“I don’t know. I guess I’m still trying to come to terms with everything.” I answered. “But... I think I have something close to an answer now.”
Abel looked over at me. “Is that right?”
“Yeah. I’ve decided that I’m going to always think about every life I have to take. I’ll think about if I really have to kill, and if I do, I’ll bear that weight on my shoulders. I don’t ever want this to become easy. This deserves thought every time.” I said.
Abel had that sad look in his eyes again. “It’s a failure of us adults to have made a world where a kid like you has to think about such things. I’m sorry, Alphonse.”
“Don’t apologize. You helped me learn this valuable lesson. Thank you, Abel.” I said.
That grin, the one I remembered seeing as he left Rena’s cabin all those years ago, returned to his face. “I’m glad I could repay you, then.”
We rode the rest of the way back to the city in silence. I was still twisted up inside about taking lives, but now I knew how to weigh life. Like Abel said, I was still a kid, and I shouldn’t have had to think about stuff like this. But, I was able to save a few lives today. Many soldiers died, but the body count would’ve been higher if I weren’t with them. Abel would’ve died. I was able to save his life once again. It felt odd; the first person I’d ever saved appeared when I took someone’s life for the first time. I felt the bitter irony of that cling to my mind.
Memories of my first meeting with Abel brought upon a rush of homesickness. I still had not told Zelda about Rena or about what happened to my hometown, but I just couldn’t bring myself to say anything at the time. I felt a longing to go home and visit Rena. It was getting closer to two years since I’d left. I wanted to return and tell her all about what happened to me.
I shook my head. Zelda seemed to be concerned, but she allowed me to be with my thoughts.
Perhaps it was too soon to go back home. I had just learned this valuable lesson, after all. I thought that Rena would be proud to see the man this lesson helped me become. But, someday soon, I would go home.
And whenever that day may come, I would be able to greet her with a smile.
- 2 YEARS LATER -
My ragged breaths could barely be heard over the sounds of my panicked sprinting. I could still smell the freshly smoldering remains of Hyleigh City behind me. I carried in my arms an unconscious little girl who had just lost her parents to the Demon Lord Vaati.
“Damn it... Damn it...” I breathed through tears.
Zelda flew as fast as she could to keep up with me. I tripped over myself, and quickly turned on my side so Saria wouldn’t get hurt. I skidded in the grass, getting dirt stains on my shirt.
“Damn it!” I said, louder.
“Alphonse, be careful!” Zelda said.
“We have to hurry! Rena’s house is still deeper in the forest!”
Scrambling to get back to my feet, I made sure that Saria didn’t take any of the impact from my fall. She seemed to be unchanged, but blood still dripped from her forehead. I clenched my teeth in frustration and continued to run.
Yes, Saria had lost her parents. Roy and Gracia were no more. But they were not the only ones. Every person in Hyleigh City, including the royal family, had just been killed, in one fell swoop. That was the power Vaati possessed.
As I ran, I thought about another person who had surely perished in that hellfire. The man who had helped me understand the weight and value of life. The soldier, Abel, was dead, too, unable to even get the chance to defend his city.
Tears began streaming down my face once again. They stung my eyes, and my throat closed up.
- I’m sorry... I couldn’t do anything for you. I couldn’t do anything for any of you. But, I swear, I will save Saria. I’ll at least save this one person in front of me. And I will never stand by and let a tragedy like this happen again. I will save as many lives as I possibly can, from now on...
That was my vow. That was the weight I chose to bear.
And that's that. I hope you enjoyed reading this story! I want to leave a link to the
full Google Drive folder here, because it's the most complete in terms of proofreading and updates, and all the chapters are in the proper order. It also contains statistics on the full word count and page count for the entire story, each individual chapter, and each arc. It also has an afterword at the end of the credit roll which I think dedicated readers will appreciate. I know I certainly appreciate every person that has taken the time to read my story! Thank you all very much for your support over the years. It really means a lot to me.