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The Confession Thread *SERIOUS REPLIES*

Pen

The game is on!
Ugh, it is so much more difficult than it should be. I attend school away from my home town, so I don't get to see my parents often. But I don't really want to tell them over the phone. Bit I also don't really want to keep it from them until I see them again so I should tell them over the phone. But I don't really know how to say it, and I want to tell them both at the same time so it would have to be on speaker phone. GAH!

Sorry for the rant.

Hi, I know it's been like two weeks since you posted this, but just in case you're still having the same problem I could tell you how I dealt with my problem that was pretty much the exact same as yours. I don't live with my parents anymore since I study in another city so I don't see them very often at all. After I met my girlfriend I wanted to tell my family about her, but I also wanted to tell them all at the same time and stuff like that. At first I figured I'd wait till I see them all again, but I realized that would take too long, so I simply arranged a casual little video call on Skype where I could talk to my mom, dad and sister at the same time. We just started the conversation like any other, but after a little while I told them that I'd found this super amazing girl that I've been together with for the past two weeks or so. They all took it really well and it felt great afterwards.

Of course you might have already solved this problem, but I figured I'd share my story in case it helps any. ^^
 
Joined
Jan 30, 2015
Location
Alagaesia
Hi, I know it's been like two weeks since you posted this, but just in case you're still having the same problem I could tell you how I dealt with my problem that was pretty much the exact same as yours. I don't live with my parents anymore since I study in another city so I don't see them very often at all. After I met my girlfriend I wanted to tell my family about her, but I also wanted to tell them all at the same time and stuff like that. At first I figured I'd wait till I see them all again, but I realized that would take too long, so I simply arranged a casual little video call on Skype where I could talk to my mom, dad and sister at the same time. We just started the conversation like any other, but after a little while I told them that I'd found this super amazing girl that I've been together with for the past two weeks or so. They all took it really well and it felt great afterwards.

Of course you might have already solved this problem, but I figured I'd share my story in case it helps any. ^^

Thanks so much for sharing!

It has already been dealt with, though it didn't go exactly as planned... so I think it is story time!
I went home for Easter weekend. I thought it would be perfect, I would be home so it would be no problem. Though the day I got home i went and ran some errands with my mom. While we were in the car she asked me... "So you have a boyfriend yet?". I couldn't very well lie to her, so I told her. But I also told her I had wanted to share this with both her and my dad at the same time, so she promised she wouldn't say anything. Fast forward to that night. My family went over to my grandparents house for dinner. It was great and everyone was having a grand ole time stuffing their faces and chatting. And THEN my mom decides to ask me... "Hey, so do you have a boyfriend?" and turns to me and winks. I just sit there and stare at her for a minute, and then once the shock wore off I told them that yes I did and who he was. AND THEN SHE STARTED TELLING THEM ABOUT HIM! I mean everything we talked about in the car! Which was exactly what I didn't want! My dad even looked at her and asked how she knew all of this. It was so incredibly awkward! But oh well, the deed has been done.
 

DarkLink7

I make my own fate!
Joined
Oct 7, 2012
Location
Valla
I crush on people easy. It's not a major impediment or a shameful secret or anything, just a fun fact.

Oh same. I've had so many crushes, but legitimately falling for someone has happened to me 3 times, and two crashes and burned while the third is sailing still.

But I'm super pessimistic and cynical.
 

Sydney

The Good Samaritan
Joined
Mar 20, 2012
Location
Canberra, Australia
boohoo poor me

This has been really hard for me to deal with lately, but my family is kind of falling into complete disarray primarily due to financial issues. It's getting to us really bad, and I think it's making my mom's depression a lot worse, and it's taking a toll on my dad's health. Cigs cost a lot of money and my mom smokes a pack a day, and if she can't get them then she becomes grouchy (i.e. constantly picks arguments with my dad and I, she locks herself in her room, and has no filter -- like today apparently she was making some pretty harsh comments about us, me in particular). And my dad is trying to keep it together, but I really don't know how much longer that's going to last. What's worse is that whatever money I get my parents immediately borrow from me, with no definite date as to when I'll get it back (they either owe me $20 or $40 right now, but is not as bad like when my mom stole $100 from me... which lead to a realllllyyy bad argument). I could get a job this summer, I have no idea where, but whatever income I'd make my parents would probably take from me. I have no idea what the hell will happen when I move out (which I plan on doing asafp), but it won't be pretty.

Oh and when I say financial issues, I'm not being a pathetic middle-class white kid who complains about not getting the **** that I want, I mean we literally went a solid week or more with an empty fridge, freezer, and cabinets. During that time, I'd only eat the dinner that my parents would make. No breakfast, no lunch, and really nothing in between.

Be grateful for what you have, because there are people out there who will not being eating tonight... or tomorrow... Keep that in mind.
 

Mellow Ezlo

Spoony Bard
Joined
Dec 2, 2012
Location
eh?
Gender
Slothkin
boohoo poor me

This has been really hard for me to deal with lately, but my family is kind of falling into complete disarray primarily due to financial issues. It's getting to us really bad, and I think it's making my mom's depression a lot worse, and it's taking a toll on my dad's health. Cigs cost a lot of money and my mom smokes a pack a day, and if she can't get them then she becomes grouchy (i.e. constantly picks arguments with my dad and I, she locks herself in her room, and has no filter -- like today apparently she was making some pretty harsh comments about us, me in particular). And my dad is trying to keep it together, but I really don't know how much longer that's going to last. What's worse is that whatever money I get my parents immediately borrow from me, with no definite date as to when I'll get it back (they either owe me $20 or $40 right now, but is not as bad like when my mom stole $100 from me... which lead to a realllllyyy bad argument). I could get a job this summer, I have no idea where, but whatever income I'd make my parents would probably take from me. I have no idea what the hell will happen when I move out (which I plan on doing asafp), but it won't be pretty.

Oh and when I say financial issues, I'm not being a pathetic middle-class white kid who complains about not getting the **** that I want, I mean we literally went a solid week or more with an empty fridge, freezer, and cabinets. During that time, I'd only eat the dinner that my parents would make. No breakfast, no lunch, and really nothing in between.

Be grateful for what you have, because there are people out there who will not being eating tonight... or tomorrow... Keep that in mind.

Wow, I'm really sorry to hear this.

I can't say I've ever been in a true financial crisis, but I know people who have, and so I've seen it. I went to my friend's house once and there was literally no food in the house save for a bunch of bananas and some bread. I was stunned. I can't imagine having to live that way. Even my mom, a heavy smoker, makes weekly trips to the food bank due to not having enough money for food. Every time I visit her, I get sad, not because I'm greedy and want food, but because I need it. I go there and try really hard not to empty her cupboards, usually resulting in me getting sick. Granted, she lives alone, but it's shocking to see people in my own family needing to visit the food bank.

As for your parents stealing money from you, that's just wrong. That's not something I can honestly say I'm unfamiliar with, so I can sympathize a bit. My mom used all my birthday money one year so that she could go out for dinner with her friends. I still, to this day, haven't gotten it back.

I'm really sorry you have to go through this. All I can say is to keep on holding on. I hope it all works out for you in the end! *hugs*
 

Jamie

Till the roof comes off, till the lights go out...
Joined
Feb 23, 2014
Gender
trans-pan-demi-ethno-christian-math-autis-genderfluid-cheesecake
Sydney got me wanting to share my own little story
I always thought my family was pretty normal and that we don't have any "real" problems, but over time things have gotten worse and worse, and things from the past have been revealed to me. Well, here we go...

My brother was born when my mother was 19. His father abused both my brother and my mother and was out of the picture shortly after my brother's birth. My sister was born when my mother was 22, and I don't think she even knows her father's name. I was born when my mother was 25, and my dad is the only one in the picture. I suppose I always felt I was lucky, and perhaps I am.

When my brother was born, she got little if any support from her parents, because they wanted her to get an abortion. I think today they regret that decision. My mother, shortly after my brother was born, was violently raped. Like, alley-way raped. She was beaten half to death walking down the street at night, and was raped; the culprit got of free. She then gave up my brother for a year while she was dealing with depression and PTSD. I don't believe she was ever diagnosed with PTSD, but there's no doubt she's got it.

By the time I was born, my mother had had multiple abusive boyfriends, most of which likely hit my brother as well. When my brother was young, like 4-5, he was molested regularly in a scout camp for kids called "Beavers". This man, Doug, drove him to Beavers, and molested him for a very long time. It doesn't help that my brother has always had serious, serious ADHD and Tourette's. And honestly, today he'd probably be diagnosed with Asperger's. He was impossible to take care of, he'd get up at 5 am and scream at the top of his lungs, he'd get in trouble all the time at school, he got kicked out of Sunday School and pretty much everything he was ever involved with. He was the most impossible kid to bring up that I could ever imagine, and the molestation just made it worse.

When we were little, we were very poor, and lived in a poor black neighbourhood. I don't remember any of it, but I can tell you this...being the only white family in a poor black neighbourhood isn't easy, as you could imagine. My brother was beat on all of the time, and his only "friend" beat him up and told his father that my brother called him a ******. If you ever, ever met my brother, he doesn't have a racist bone in his body. I have many issues with my brother, but questionable morals is not one of them.

By the time I was in grade 1 or so, we lived in a decent home and had a decent amount of money coming in. But things around me started becoming more and more apparent. My sister, who was always a bit of a "rebel", has Cystic Fibrosis. She is going to die before she is supposed to. It's very sudden, CF. One day, she will go to the hospital. A month later, she will come out for a week. Then, she'll go to the hospital for a couple more days, and die. It regularly happens like that. They let them out and tell them they are better, but I think everyone including themselves knows that they aren't. It could happen today, tomorrow, maybe 10 years from now, but it's going to happen. She spent the first year of her life in the hospital. I've always lived with this fact, and it's eaten away at me little by little. Not a day goes by that I don't think about it, and as a result, I am extremely protective of my beautiful older sister.

After my parents' divorce, things got a little messy. My mother got laid off from her job, and it took her a lot of time to get back on her feet. She met another man, he is a nice guy but has a bit of a temper. But at the current moment, they are in insurmountable debt, and they never have food. I never know what to eat there, it's always a fend for yourself deal. I never go to my mom's anymore, I can't do it. It's gross. Everything's broken; it's never clean, and it's costly for me.

And my mother...she is a shell of herself. Prior to the divorce with my father, she stopped really talking to him. Eventually he couldn't handle it anymore so he asked for a divorce and she didn't really care. After she met my step dad, Mark, her life brightened up again, but now she's worse than ever. When I come home, she walks downstairs, gives me a hug, and goes back up, and then I won't see her for the rest of the time unless my nephew comes over. My own mother doesn't spend time with me, even though I've hardly seen her at all for 6 years due to boarding school and university. It's depressing to watch her. She eats one meal a day, and it's only because my step dad brings food to her. Ever since I can remember, my mother has been sick all of the time. Always vomiting. They recently found out she has a condition called "colitis", but that can't be the only thing. She had her uterus and ovaries removed, on separate occasions. Any bug going around, she gets it. I've never seen someone as illness prone as her. And to be honest, and I feel awful saying this, but she looks terrible. When she was young, she was a very very pretty lady, and I'm not saying this because she's my mother. She has let herself go, gained some weight, and just overall looks awful. It's all because of the rape...that's how I know it's PTSD. She always goes back to this, she can't get it out of her head and she refuses to see therapy.

I don't know whether to feel bad for my mother, or to be angry at her. She cheated on my father, and asked my brother to lie in court against him if it ever went to court (and as I said about my brother, he would never do anything like this). A lot of it is her own doing, but...she's my mother. I still love her and I want her to be happy, and it's painful to see this.

My brother now is probably 150 pounds overweight, lives with my mom at 25 (almost 26), and hasn't had a steady job...ever. My sister has two kids at 22(almost 23), and no foreseeable job opportunities. Luckily, she has an incredibly nice and hardworking boyfriend. And then there's me, the mentally ****ed kid of 19 (almost 20), who failed a bunch of classes because I was too depressed to get out of bed. I didn't even bother writing my exams this semester. I think everyone in my family aside from my dad (who suffers from severe anxiety issues) is currently severely depressed. What a mess.

There is kind of a moral here, and I guess it's that...we're all still here. My family is ****ed, and we're all still here. And I don't give a **** what anyone says, I am going to get through all of my issues, and I am going to live a good life. So yeah, that's my story, I suppose.
 
Joined
Feb 23, 2011
That moment when you read something about someone that changes your whole perception of them. My gosh. I almost shed a tear while reading this stuff. Sorry for the off-topicness, but just...wow.

This is why no one should ever get online just to make another person's day even worse. You never know what the hell they're going through or the trouble they've seen. Be nice to each other, it's as simple as that. (That goes for me, too.)
 

Jamie

Till the roof comes off, till the lights go out...
Joined
Feb 23, 2014
Gender
trans-pan-demi-ethno-christian-math-autis-genderfluid-cheesecake
That moment when you read something about someone that changes your whole perception of them. My gosh. I almost shed a tear while reading this stuff. Sorry for the off-topicness, but just...wow.

This is why no one should ever get online just to make another person's day even worse. You never know what the hell they're going through or the trouble they've seen. Be nice to each other, it's as simple as that. (That goes for me, too.)
Was this directed at me? If so I appreciate it considering the many disputes we've had. If not, never mind lol
 
Joined
Feb 23, 2011
Was this directed at me? If so I appreciate it considering the many disputes we've had. If not, never mind lol
I've never been the type to sugarcoat things; that is to say, you'd know if it was directed at you. If it applies to you, though, then okeydokey.
 

Jamie

Till the roof comes off, till the lights go out...
Joined
Feb 23, 2014
Gender
trans-pan-demi-ethno-christian-math-autis-genderfluid-cheesecake
I've never been the type to sugarcoat things; that is to say, you'd know if it was directed at you. If it applies to you, though, then okeydokey.
You could have just said "no, it wasn't."
 
Joined
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Gender
'); DROP TABLE Gender
There's been several suspicions about who I am in this forum and I'll go ahead and confirm that I was formally @Ayn Stein or "M107" if you knew me better by that name. Despite that account not being banned, my reasons for making another account had to do with wanting to start over fresh (basically a new identity if you will) and losing the credentials for the old one. I ask however not to merge my accounts together in anyway.

The reasons for leaving suddenly in February had to do with some actions I stated in an open letter and various other personal issues I won't get into here. Needless to say, things have slowly been coming around.
 

Mellow Ezlo

Spoony Bard
Joined
Dec 2, 2012
Location
eh?
Gender
Slothkin
There's been several suspicions about who I am in this forum and I'll go ahead and confirm that I was formally @Ayn Stein or "M107" if you knew me better by that name. Despite that account not being banned, my reasons for making another account had to do with wanting to start over fresh (basically a new identity if you will) and losing the credentials for the old one. I ask however not to merge my accounts together in anyway.

The reasons for leaving suddenly in February had to do with some actions I stated in an open letter and various other personal issues I won't get into here. Needless to say, things have slowly been coming around.

I knew it was you from the beginning because of your use of :right: :P

loljk

In all honesty, though, it's nice having you back here. Hope your personal issues are able to sort themselves out! :)



Anyway, I guess I should go ahead and make a confession.

In my life, most notably in the past few years, I've done several things that I instantly regretted, some of these things being extremely recent. I've hurt people, I've lied to people, I've made people believe I was something I wasn't. I'm not specifically speaking about here on this forum, but in general. I've said things to people that should never have been said, I've done things to people that should never have been done. Worst of all, though, I've done things to myself that I would never dream of doing now. Everything that's happened these past few years, everything I've done, I feel extremely sorry for all of it. I've ruined friendships, not all of them being my own. I've torn people apart. I've torn myself apart. I have regrets. And I'm sorry for it all. The thing is, though, despite wishing I'd never done many of the things I've done, I'm glad I did them. It sounds weird to say, that I'm glad to have done the bad things I've done, that I'm glad to have hurt people. I don't mean it in that way, I'm just glad they happened because it allowed me to see the world in a different light. I've been able to look at myself differently, I've been able to look at others differently. I've been able to improve my attitude, my work ethic, my overall disposition. I've been able to better myself as a person. If I hadn't done some of the things I've done, I don't know where I'd be. I certainly wouldn't be the person I am today though. That's why I'm glad everything that's happened has happened.

tbh I don't even know if this belongs here. Idk if this counts as a confession or not. But it's what I feel. Everything happens for a reason. And the bad things I've done, the people I've hurt, everything that happened, were all steps towards bettering myself. Sometimes, in order to clean up a mess, you need to make a bigger one in the process. That's how my life went. I'm sorry for it all, and I regret it all, but I am glad it all happened. Does that make sense?

Not really a confession, but I guess it kind of is.
 

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