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Random Moments from Anything and Everything

Lord Vain

Dawn of a New Day
Joined
Nov 29, 2011
Yeta: NO TAKE MIRROR! REEAAARGGG!

Midna: Ahhh! Crazy Yeti b*tch, everyone for themselves!

(The Blizzeta Boss Script I wrote when I was bored way back in 2009)
 
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onebizarrekai

gay energy
Joined
Feb 28, 2010
Location
New York
Gender
Agender
“I’M INNOCENT!!” Link insisted, burying his face in his hands. “She wouldn’t shut up! You’ve got to believe me!”

“Oh, don’t worry!” the strange fairy assured. “I’ve almost been sent to jail numerous times. More times than I’ve been sent to jail! And I’ve been sent to jail just as many times as I’ve broken out of jail!”

---

Currently, I'm rewriting an old story that I thought was so hilarious at certain times that I just HAD to (pretty much completely) rewrite it. This is a scene from it.
 
Some gems from my teachers this year

"Have you ever seen somebody sneeze and they just have that look that everything has gone horribly wrong?"

"You can't draw a circle because you're not at peace with yourself. See, you start drawing the circle and everything is fine, but then you start thinking 'I have to close the circle', and then you chicken out."

"We're gonna watch a video about the Great Gatsby" *starts video* *video plays for a few seconds, then shuts off* "You guys getting a lot from this?"

*The teacher is acting a bit hyper* "There was a birthday celebration this morning where everyone got a big cupcake, and you guys are reaping the benefits of that"

"The principle said I should start smiling more when I make sarcastic comments or people won't get it and they'll just think I'm mean"

"I used to teach kindergarten. It makes you want to be a better person. High school does the opposite: it makes you want to be meaner"

"My lovelies, you are going to write an essay either supporting or refuting this statement." *puts writing prompt on the projector* Student:"Can we use our book?" Teacher:"No you cannot use your book!" *entire class sits in silence, not writing anything* "Ugh, you guys are pathetic. Fine, notes, books, whatever you have, go."

Student: "What are your thoughts on eating" Teacher: "I'm pretty good at it... I bite my cheek sometimes."

"I see you guys in the hall, and I feel like I should say hi, but I don't know who any of you are."

"You know those teachers that just go 'here's the formula, go do it?' I don't do that. I show you how it works first, then you learn the formula. I'm the grandfather in the room who, when you ask for the time, I have to explain how the whole watch works."
 

onebizarrekai

gay energy
Joined
Feb 28, 2010
Location
New York
Gender
Agender
Claus: (shakes head) This is getting too crazy. We must escape immediately, Lucas! Get on my back, we’re going out the window!

Lucas: Okay, now I’m convinced that you’re insane.

(I have so many funny quotes from this story, I'm putting a lot of scenes from it XD)
 

Dragoncat

Twilit wildcat: Aerofelis
“Did you name him yet?”

Zelda shook her head. “No. We should pick a name together. When you were running around the surface back then, did you find any names that were used before people had to move to the sky?”

“I didn’t. There was no sign of any of our ancestors’ names.”

“I see.” Zelda sighed. “So much for that idea.”

“But I do have a name that I think would work. Found it on a headstone in the Skyloft graveyard...all I know is it was the name of a knight who got killed in battle. I liked the sound of it.” Link paused for a second. “If you aren’t wierded out by that...”

“Not at all.”

“Good.” Link stroked the newborn’s forehead with one finger. “The name I saw was Fletcher.”

Zelda’s face lit up at the sound of the name. “That was the knight commander when my dad was in school! He apparently died trying to get rid of a swarm of skytails, he fought right until he drew his last breath. From what I heard, he was very brave and noble. That’s a great name! Perfect for a prince!” She rested her head on Link’s shoulder, a soft grin across her face. “What do you think of your name, Fletcher?”

Fletcher heard his mother, but he was too young to understand any words, and too young to comment on his name. His tiny pointed ears twitched, he already knew the sound of his parents’ voices. But now he was hungry. He needed his first meal, and he was going to get it in the only way he knew how: by squealing and pawing at his father’s lower belly.

Link just sat there with a dumb look on his face, but Zelda knew what it meant. “I believe that means he’s hungry.”

“For a second I thought he was trying to tell us he didn’t like his name.” Link picked Fletcher up and handed him to Zelda.

(As of now unpublished, from the Stormy Skies fanfic. I had to write out this scene before I got to that point...just because, it was one of my favorite parts from the RP. In the RP however, the method they used to choose a name wasn't mentioned, I came up with it on the spot when I decided to skip ahead to this. Remember that fan animation on the main site that said Link's father was killed by skytails? I borrowed that...in my head canon he never knew his father because he was an orphan though.)
 

Dragoncat

Twilit wildcat: Aerofelis
*picks up juice bottle that looks like this*
protein-zone-mango.png

"Look everybody I got naked!"

(Me at work at the recycling center)
 

onebizarrekai

gay energy
Joined
Feb 28, 2010
Location
New York
Gender
Agender
Fat Zora: AUGH! I’M ON FIRE!!!

Link: Then do something about it!

Fat Zora: I can’t! I’m too fat!

----
A scene from my character Endy's original story.
 

Dragoncat

Twilit wildcat: Aerofelis
My family spending the night in the hospital because of my aunt's condition(see my blog for details):

Mom: Do you want me to go get a p-i-l-l-o-w?
Cousin: What?

*later*

Uncle: *wakes up*
Big scary security guard: Are you supposed to be here? Do you have a patient here? What room are they in?
Uncle: I don't remember the room number but I know where it is! :S

*later*

Uncle: *farts*
Other uncle: :lol:
Uncle: :lol:
Mom: You two sound like a couple of little girls giggling at a slumber party!

My family is crazy...
 

Sirmat

*Blank* fears me.
Joined
Jul 13, 2012
Location
*Insert place here*
The internets classic:

Haikus are quite fun,
But sometimes they do not make sense,
Refrigerator.

My response to that:

Be original,
Come up with something new and stop,
Talking 'bout your fridge.

And now, the silliest thing I said last year! It's... *Drumroll*

Lord of the dance* is the Easter story retold by a guy who has not had water for days.

((* A follow-up to Riverdance. Looks a bit like this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=By4NUxd6z3s ))
 
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