Fraxinus
chunky plant goop
how was i avoiding ex? this is the first time ive seen him in ltpw... i liked his post in the sb when i saw he greeted me, along with cthulhu and mark i think? i didnt really think of the discord thing at all; i thought we were okay. i thought he was happy to see me
i dont like being pitied, i am highly sensitive to people being nice to me out of pity and i always have been. cannot handle people messaging me that do not normally message me because they think i deserve pity, i dont have many zders on discord but i muted my dms with all of them when i left zd because i didnt *want* to talk about it. i thought my silence was enough; i was afraid me trying to say something would devolve into a conversation about it that i didnt want to have because people ALWAYS push me around into situations i cant deal with because im such a dimwit afraid of hurting their feelings. thats how i got INTO this mess.
....i didnt comment on the lmfao thing because of staff, but im frustrated it was taken that way cuz it felt like such an obvious way for it to be taken and im sorry.. i just felt like you thought i was some stupid conspiracy junkie and that i was invalid for feeling this way
but yeah im probably signing out for awhile. nothing any of you did but i dont think i was ready to log back in. but im glad i checked the thread again cuz if im being an asshole with my communication, i dont want to leave you with that impression while im gone.
i dont like being pitied, i am highly sensitive to people being nice to me out of pity and i always have been. cannot handle people messaging me that do not normally message me because they think i deserve pity, i dont have many zders on discord but i muted my dms with all of them when i left zd because i didnt *want* to talk about it. i thought my silence was enough; i was afraid me trying to say something would devolve into a conversation about it that i didnt want to have because people ALWAYS push me around into situations i cant deal with because im such a dimwit afraid of hurting their feelings. thats how i got INTO this mess.
....i didnt comment on the lmfao thing because of staff, but im frustrated it was taken that way cuz it felt like such an obvious way for it to be taken and im sorry.. i just felt like you thought i was some stupid conspiracy junkie and that i was invalid for feeling this way
but yeah im probably signing out for awhile. nothing any of you did but i dont think i was ready to log back in. but im glad i checked the thread again cuz if im being an asshole with my communication, i dont want to leave you with that impression while im gone.