Alright, well the clear first choice for me is Selenus.
I'm not a lesbian, but I feel like that's the only real hang up I would have. We could be the best sexless marriage ever. We both like cats. We both like torturing DM. We both like all things nerdy. We both like many of the same shows, games, and books. We both have come from rough circumstances so any time we fought it'd just be us arguing about who had it worse. She's also taller than me so I could be the little spoon, which is ideal. I find her cute, so that would be endearing.
STILL, if I have to include the possibility that naked things could occur...Hmmm. I guess Deus? He's English and I love their accents. He often makes me laugh which I feel like would be very important. He seems to go along with my long-winded never ending jokes which most boys don't because they think I'm insane. I like his avatar because it is from an excellent anime I have many fond memories attached to. AND ALSO, he was really nice and welcoming to me on this forum so he might possibly be a good guy.
And, I guess if I'm looking to be in an abusive relationship where I'm the abuser and there will be no sex or real love, I'd choose DM to be my bottom *****.