How Have You Changed?

[Beauts]

First of all, hi everyone, I haven't been around much lately so I thought I should drop in and start a thread so here we are.

Basically I was thinking about how much I've changed over the past couple of years- not just how my life is, but also in character and stuff. For me, the change has been gradual but big. I have become less neurotic, more balanced, but also less likely to be pushed around. Does anyone else feel they've changed in any way and how would you describe it?

 

[Mercedes]

I think I've just become my own person. During school and growing up I was pretty easily led on, I can look back and know this. I would do things because my friends said they were cool and stuff, my hobbies were pretty much what was going on with my friends and stuff like that, something a lot of teenagers go through I think. I mean, my late teens was absolutely full of just going out every night and drinking and then spending the next morning being sick as a dog. My friends dyed their hair so I dyed my hair. My friends cut it short, I cut it short. They got boyfriends, I got boyfriends I barely liked! Desperation just to fit in, really, it was sad thinking back but thats what school's like!

And now, totally different! I mean, for a start I haven't been drunk in years. I like a glass of wine every so often like everybody but, yeah, I'm more comfortable now. I'm not embarrassed to say I like games like I used to and I'm confident to say "No, **** off" if someone tries to make me do something I don't like. So, less of a push-over and just more confident by far! And in general, I think I'm just more comfortable with myself, the way I look and who I am. It's a nice place to be in life.

I think the change started when I had my first girlfriend, cos I was nervous about it all at the start. But I really liked the girl and it was like, well, screw it, I'll just say I'm dating her. And my friends were all really cool and supportive about it, so, I think that was the shifting point where I realized they were true friends and I didn't need to try so hard to fit in. Before then I'd have never mentioned being attracted to girls.

Just a part of growing up I think. When your a teenager everything's a bit crazy but, stuff calms down. Got a job, my own place, in a nice relationship, and a ****ing 70" TV for half price in the sales! Score. So yeah, that's my change over recent years. I think I'm also a lot softer and lovey, and I think that's down to finally being in a good relationship rather than one with just arguments all the time. Although we will be having a large one if he doesn't stop widdling on the damn toilet seat, IT TAKES LIKE .5 SECONDS TO LIFT UP AND .5 SECONDS TO PUT IT BACK DOWN AGAIN!!! screw men, im going lesbo

 

[Beauts]

Although we will be having a large one if he doesn't stop widdling on the damn toilet seat, IT TAKES LIKE .5 SECONDS TO LIFT UP AND .5 SECONDS TO PUT IT BACK DOWN AGAIN!!! screw men, im going lesbo

Hahaha, I wish I could go lesbo, but I don't fancy girls it's nice to see that you feel you've changed for the better, I definitely have.

To go into more detail of the changes I was talking about, I would say some of it is similar to what you say Mercedes, but at the same time not. My early teens were very friendshippy, but I got around some very negative people. At the time I thought I was happy but I was miserable. They all turned against me, spread rumours about me and turned what should be relatively easy days around the age of 15 and 16 into absolute hell. At 14 I'd been happy, but those girls destroyed my confidence and I lost all sense of who I was. Things got a bit better in college, I fell in love for the first time though nothing came of it, but it was an exciting time. I also made some genuinely good friends. Then my mum nearly died and it went tits up. I had a huge breakdown and developed both anxiety and depression. In order to cope with that in some ways I began to try and fit in with others around me. I listened to less of the music I liked, so that I would actually know the 'popular' songs of the time. I was going out all the time, and that led to many incidences of being too drunk especially under age, and a revolving door of meaningless nobody guys. I still go out a fair bit now but I have managed to get a small group of friends around me, and when I do go out it's usually more low key. I definitely still occasionally get drunk and have fun, but I don't drink to get drunk. It just happens sometimes because hey, I'm still learning. I'm also getting back into my music, my interests, and thinking about myself instead of everyone else for a change. So I feel I am just happier in myself. I don't have the best job but I have a job. I don't have a boyfriend but I am happy to wait for the right guy and not just have my tongue shoved down the first half decent guy who looks my way XD

 

[CraptainFalcon]

Alright everyone! Prepare yourselves, hold on to your seat because...

STORYTIME WITH CRAPTAINFALCON! (Warning: Not for the feint of heart).

Alright where do I start...um... I used to be a really nervous little boy. Especially around girls. And hot girls.

I had friends, yeah, but sometimes I wouldn't talk much with them because of that. UNTIL... puberty

I gained this weird confidence all of a sudden and would talk and talk. But not to girls, YET. It was until Grade 8 that I actually talked WAAAAAAAYYYYYY more to girls. Making them laugh, becoming friends with them, admitting having a crush on that specific one. Then, high school came. I talked to even more girls. EVEN, the hotest one in the school. I overcame my fear of playing a song for the talent show, played guitar with the older kids. Man, how much did that scared little boy change...

In looks, I grew out my 'stache and beard (not "beard", more like manly stubble). I slicked my hair back, grew taller than most grade 10's at my school. And yeah...

Alright kids, time for bed. That was STORYTIME WITH CRAPTAINFALCON. (I should start a blog about that!)

 

[Ver-go-a-go-go]

Most people would say that they gained confidence, and that it's a good thing that they did. That's great, especially because having a good sense of self-worth and pride is important. I actually got the opposite, having my own image knocked down a few notches. I was kind of a jerk for a while, and I'm glad I was forced to eat some humble pie before going off to college. Yeah, I could bore all of you with more details, but that's the biggest one that comes to mind in simplified form.

 

[Justac00lguy]

I was a ****er [true story].

I was a clever kid, but my school wasn't exactly great; I had a great group of friends, but let's just say they're not exactly angels. They smoked, drunk, did drugs - you name it. It wasn't always like this; just the latter years of school when they [my group of friends] became manipulated by the social norm of our school and age. Anyway, I was influenced by this... sort of. Well I never did drugs or fully smoked. I used to "socially" smoke (very rarely) at a period of time. I hung round on street corners, drunk; I hung round with thugs basically. I would get into fights occasionally, my friends would - it was a endless cycle and one that leads to many's downfall. This phase affected my education and, even though I was clever, I never did homework and was always in trouble.

I guess I turned around during my final year or certainly near the end of it. My family always encouraged me to do well and were disappointed in my antics and general performance in school. I was never disrespectful to them, and yeah I was still in the top classes, but I was just heading towards impending failure. I basically kicked myself in the *** and motivated myself to do well in my final exams and I did; they were actually good marks, but I was predicted straight As (so yeah bit of a disappointment in that department). Main point is that I got into college and, even though I still hung round with my former friends, I met new people and became less of a "thug" (harsh term, lol). I still got drunk, went out, but I was more mature about it. However, I was still hanging round with my old set of friends who were still intent on taking drugs, picking fights - I grew past that and eventually grew past them in my latter year of college.

Even though I did mature and become a better person, my old habits remained throughout my college tenure (16-18). I wasn't committed, I never did work, I rarely studied etc. In the end I pulled through and got into University. Anyway, I think we all--or some of us--can go through that phase where we do make the wrong decisions, but life is about overcoming these I guess and it moulds our future selves. Now, I don't surround myself with the wrong people, I'm more motivated, I'm not obsessed with getting into relationships, I'm not stressed, I'm not as angry; I guess I've changed quite a bit. I'm in a place now where I've left University (momentarily) and set on moving to another country to pursue my career. I'm happy with what the near future holds and I know what I want to be and I'm focused on achieving my goal - though I'll never be content, I never will be, and I guess that my biggest weakness.

 

[Yuuago]

I think the main thing that I've learned in recent years is that no matter what you do, you can't please everybody. You could be the sweetest person in the world, but no matter what, somebody is still going to take issue with you. I spent too much time trying to please other people, and lost sight of the fact that what I need to do is make sure that I'm happy and confident in myself.

 

[Jimmu]

I think for me currently I am undergoing big changes and kind of looking do discover who I want to be rather than who everyone else wants me to be or what I think everyone else wants me to be. It's hard for me to answer the question now but by the start of 2015 I expect that I will not be the same person that I am today, I hope to be much happier, more confident in myself and care less about what others think. Well that's the plan anyway, we'll have to wait and see how it goes.

 

[Firice da Vinci]

I have changed both a lot and very minutely. Until mid-seventh grade, I had no one to call a friend. To mend this issue, I tried my best to cast away my shyness and bring out my inner extrovert, and it worked. I went from two people liking me, to my class, to some people in other grades. For the remainder of that year and the majority of the next, I was quite content. For once in my life, an insignificant castaway could be a part of the crown. Unfortunately, I realized something: my true self was lost. By fitting in, by personality was ruder, prejudiced, irrational--everything I once detested.

Who am I? What am I? How will I maintain my existence in the future? That was my summer break.

I am currently a freshman in high school, not that I care. Many things people knew about me were just...gone. Not all my friends disappeared, but I feel as though they will. In fact, part of me wants to be left alone to wallow in pitiful misery. By everyone. Yes, family and peers alike. Seriously, I feel no love toward them, thus they have not a reason to care for me. What is the worst that could truly happen to a singularity such as I?

An online depression test want ranked me from mild-moderate to severe at times. I have yet to be proven clinically. Would it be a good idea to seek a doctor's therapy. Most likely. Too bad it won't work. In fact, I am positive treatment will not work. The thought of using antidepressants to escape reality is not my style. Most of the advice people give is worn out and overused, leading to a lack in value.

So, why am I still alive? Dreams and hopes. Comprehension to the life's value is still with me. There is a legacy waiting for me to grasp. People that need me to survive. As an honor student and current candidate to be Valedictorian of 2017, I simply have to much promise to die with. To defy whatever life throw's at me and never go down without a struggle: my motto. My future will be better. I will get stronger. It will not be easy, but getting out of this emotional slump is top-priority, for I possess something great.

Purpose.

(Arigatos to any who decided to read my ramblings. I easily get carried away.)

 

[RedLink]

I've become less of an extrovert and more of an introvert b/c I realized how horrible humans are to one another.

 

[Salem]

Believe it or not, I haven't really changed to much sense my school days.

 

[Vanessa28]

I used to be an extremely shy person when I was a kid. I never dared to go anywhere inside when there were people present. I was kicked into adulthood when I was 15 years old. Having to take responsibilites that a child shouldn't have at that age like staying up late and watch the door till my mom came home while I had to get up early for school.
As years went by I overcame being so shy and I became a much stronger person. I decided it was time to quit with listen to what others told me to do. I stood up for myself and made myself heard. I also learned that it was not okay to keep things inside when it was bothering me. This is a habit that became stronger and stronger through the years. I'm not a talker. In VC's and with friends I talk yeah but I prefer to be quiet and to do my own things. But when I don't like things I will tell it directly. If I don't like a person I make this very clear and if I do like a person I also make it clear but there is no inbetween. My struggling childhood has helped me to make me change into this in my life

 

[misskitten]

I've become much calmer and a lot more patient. I had a pretty explosive temper in my childhood and especially my teen years, where on top of dealing with the usual teen things, several years of frustration and anger from bullying and dealing with current bullying left me extremely volatile and prone to angry and to a degree violent outbursts. It took me several years to calm down and get proper distance from everything I went through, and now it takes excessive stress to even get me to raise my voice. I've also become a lot more comfortable in my own skin, to the point where I just don't give a damn what other people think. If they have a problem with me, it's their problem, not mine.

You wouldn't be able to recognize the current me if putting me next to my teen self. That's how much I have changed.

 

[Snow Queen]

I've become a tad more social through my church interactions, and I also better at discovering myself. I've matured TONS, even though I still have a rather childish mentality. I've gotten better at accepting my circumstances, and it's been ages since I've shed a tear. Overall, my changes have been positive.

 

[Wolf Sage]

Okay, brief history.

Growing up, I was always the cold, cynical loner with a bad attitude and no friends. Starting in middle school, I was extremely quiet, standoffish, and rude, and I thought everyone was beneath me or "********." I had a sharp tongue, and despite being quiet, I was never hesitant to put anyone—even adults—in their place when I deemed appropriate. I'd get into big arguments (some physical) with my mom and her side of the family, especially my aunt and my cousins. I had trust issues big time, which is part of why I was so standoffish. Because of this I'd push away anyone who'd try to befriend me. Anytime someone would approach me amicably, I'd think they were gay and/or weirdos, or wanted something from me. Everyone thought that I was batsh*t psycho. This became even more noticeable when I basically became a shut-in. I was kind of a rebel, too, but not in the sense that I smoked or drank; it was more in attitude, as I'd intentionally go out of my way to be different, which explains why I never got along with my family. I use to think that I was so mature (lol).

Here's a list of my changes:

Attitude-wise:

1. I don't argue and fight with my family anymore, but I am still cast off from them.
2. I'm more driven, committed, and motivated to get things done and stick to them.
3. I no longer try and go out of my way to be different; I've discovered I just am.
4. I have become much less of a pushover, but I'm still working on it.
5. I'm slightly more open to people, and I try to avoid "reading" or forming preconceived notions about them.
6. I like to think that I no longer believe that I am superior to others.
7. No longer a rood dood; at least I try not to be.
8. Sharp tongue and such have since become a thing of the past; all that's left is numbness and an "I honestly just don't give a damn anymore" attitude towards people and life in general.

Habit-wise:

1. I'm no longer such a chronic neat freak.
2. My sleeping habits have improved.
3. I've learned to prioritize my life better; videogames and the internet are now second to work and school (lol).
4. I no longer go out of my way to impress others—the only person I try to impress is myself.
5. I've found that I read, write, and draw A LOT less than I used to, and it scares me because those are the things I used to do to "prove to myself that I exist."

Aside from the above list, I don't think that I've changed very much at all since middle school. Anything not listed there is still pretty much the same as my brief history. Because of my anxiety and depression, I have learned to accept the fact that some things'll probably never change; however, I am still a work in progress. I would like to have gone into extensive detail, but I feel as though I've said too much. Anyway, this site, for better or worse (lol), has helped change me a bit.