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How Do You Open a Watermelon


Sep 20, 2008
Joliet, IL
Generally my mother will either cut it in half, then each half in half and then cut slices there. Or she will cut the red part that you eat into cubes or triangles. A nice summer snack.

Mellow Ezlo

Spoony Bard
Dec 2, 2012
Normally, I use a knife... But I usually end up making the slices way too small. So here's a new way to open a watermelon (only for people who live in a building of at least five floors).
1: Buy a watermelon (should be a nice big, juicy one)
2: Climb to the top floor of your building
3: Find a balcony over the street (windows work too)
4: cut a hole in the watermelon (with a knife, or whatever you have)
5: Fill the hole with something (colorful, sticky liquids work best), then cover it with tape or something... Something secure so it won't fall out.
6: Throw the watermelon out the window/balcony as hard as possible, as close to the sidewalk as you can
7: If done successfully, you will have splashed some innocent people on the street with watermelon and whatever you put inside it!
8: Plead to the police (if they come), and blame your nextdoor neighbor!

If you don't want to do all that, that's OK... Another cool way to open a watermelon is with this!

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