Corrupt a wish!

[Clank]

Granted, but they break the game so that you can never win.

I wish I had baby goats now instead of in early April.

 

[Mellow Ezlo]

Granted, but they'll stay babies forever!

I wish I had a laptop

 

[Lord Vain]

Granted, however it breaks a few days later.

I wish for it to be spring.

 

[Clank]

Granted. but it only lasts a week.

I wish I was a genius with a ton of friends.

 

[misskitten]

Granted, your every creation is too complex for anyone to want them and your friends eat you out of your house.

I wish to be the Doctor's new companion

 

[TatlTails]

Granted, but you get killed by Daleks.

I wish stomachaches were wiped from existance.

 

[Dragoncat]

Granted, but now headaches get worse.

I wish I hadn't messed up my mac n cheese.

 

[TatlTails]

Granted, but you mess up your kitchen and are banned from cooking ever again.

I wish my dad didn't like gory movies.

 

[Dragoncat]

Granted, but now he likes Barney.

I wish my book would write itself.

 

[TatlTails]

Granted, but the book is a terrible atrocity entitled Twilight.

I wish my audition will go well.

 

[Hylian_Monolith]

Granted, but you get the main villain who is onstage every second and has a horrible raspy voice that you can't possibly replicate without vocal damage.

I wish the people would comment on my art thread...

 

[TatlTails]

Granted, but they're trolls and haters who undermine your self-confidence.

I wish that would most definitely not happen.

 

[Shadao]

Wish granted, now the Internet is closed for good.

I wish that the Cold War never happened.

 

[Hylian_Monolith]

Granted. It was a permanent period of economic collapse. The world is still like that.

I wish I had some non-poisonous, delicious, fresh apple pie that belonged to me and is to be eaten by me. [/closeloophole]

 

[Clank]

Granted, but you can't stop eating it and grow extremely large.
I wish I was better at programming.