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Coolest (and lamest) Name for a Video Game Console

Castle

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There have been a lot of home video game console hardware over the years, each bearing different names. Some of these names sound pretty sweet. Others? not so much...

What are the coolest and lamest?

Coolest
4.) Gamecube
Alright, so the name is a bit superficial. But at least this was the last time Ninty's gimmicks were superficial rather than a hindrance. The gamecube, despite popular opinion, may have performed as well as any other console at the time but it was its appearance that set it apart. Fun, whimsical, and something futuristic about it.
3.) Xbox 360
That's right! A full revolution in gaming. 360 degrees says it all. A new era in gaming. It's just too bad it was all down hill from there. But at least Microsoft named their console after the 7th hardware generation's pivotal place in gaming history.
2.) NeoGeo
I don't know what it means, but I like the sound of it. "New" -something? I dunno. It just rolls off the tongue, don't it? And it's fun to say.
1.) Dreamcast
Come on! What other name can invoke the notion of escapism and excitement as Dreamcast. I mean, this pretty much sums up video games in one word. New worlds and new ways of storytelling that can be brought to life like no book or movie ever could!

No points for lack of effort

These are the names that are neither good nor bad, but are so utterly generic they barely even warrant a mention.

2.) Nintendo Entertainment System
In Japan it was the "Famicom" or the Family Computer. Straightforward but catchy, right? Well elsewhere it was just the Nintendo Entertainment System, which could mean anything and takes a while to say so everyone just shortens it to N E S or nes which just sounds weird.
1.) Playstation - To Infinity and Beyond!
So the name "Playstation" is utterly generic but utilitarian. It's a station where one plays. Simple. But Sony has never broken from the naming convention of just appending numbers after each new console. In 46 years our grandkids will be playing on the Playstation 22.

Console Naming for Dummies

3.) The Nintendo Switch
Yeah I get it. The name adequately describes the functionality of the console. But as a name it doesn't exactly inspire. And there's even something a might... off putting about it. What about the act of switching can be considered fun in any circumstance? Because the only image that comes to mind when I hear the word "switch" is a leather and latex clad dominatrix wielding a whip and riding crop. Besides, how are kids supposed to take it when their parents tell them, "Hey kiddo! We're getting you a Switch for your birthday!" Scratch that. How are parents supposed to take it when their kids ask them, "Daddy! I wanna Switch for my birthday!"
2.) The Xbox One
So wait. Wasn't the first Xbox just called, "Xbox?" Is this a reboot of Xbox? So after our 360 degree revolution have we gone back to start? Oh! It's supposed to mean "All In One." Yeah well, if you have to set aside space on the box to explain the meaning of the name, then you're doing it wrong. And after all those hours spent in marketing meetings it only took whole minutes before people started calling it the Xbone.
1.) Wii
We all knew this was coming. Wii? Wii could mean anything. Wii three. Wii the people. Or my personal favorite, Wiiiiiiiiiiii!! Alright Ninty, we get it. You're cute and quirky, or at least you think you are. And I know ya'll think it's funny to make everyone go around saying "So I was playing with my Wii last night..." What does Wii even mean? How does the word Wii describe your motion control wreck, embarrassingly outdated, third party deprived, shovelware dumpster fire of a gaming device? We all know what Wii means in French. In that respect I suppose the moniker is a fitting one.
 
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"Xbox One" really struck me as being strange and unintuitive if only because it didn't seem like a logical progression from "Xbox 360". The PR disaster that followed the reveal of the Xbone probably didn't help.

I also thought "Switch" was kind of stupid at the beginning too, although it made more sense the more we learned about it. Plus it accomplished the critical task of leaving the "Wii" moniker behind, finally.

Nothing else really sticks out as being overly strange, probably because I'm been in the gaming culture for so long and I'm numb to past stupidity.
 

YIGAhim

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Sequel Consoles just need an X at the end. Not a U. Also the Wii U would have done way better if it wasn't associated with such a high bar as the Wii

Dreamcast sounds cool
Switch is alright
Playstation is cool
Xbox is weird but I like it. 1 is a horrible progression
Nintendo Entertainment System is cool
Gamecube is Cool
Nintendo 64 kinda sucked
 
Joined
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"Xbox One" really struck me as being strange and unintuitive if only because it didn't seem like a logical progression from "Xbox 360". The PR disaster that followed the reveal of the Xbone probably didn't help.
Because of that PR disaster and Microsoft completely reversing their plans for the Xbox One, I like to call it the Xbox 180. ;D

Honestly no game console name strikes me as overly bad in general to be honest. Even "Wii", despite the jokes, because I got what they were going for and however silly it might have sounded at first it feels like the silliness of the name eventually got lost within the console's success.

The coolest names probably go to Sega in general to be honest. Sega Genesis? Sega Saturn? The Dreamcast? =P
 
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Good console names - in no particular order

Nintendo Entertainment System

It explains exactly what it is. The name advertises Nintendo as a company to people outside Japan who might not have known that Nintendo had existed for over well over 50 years at that point. After the 1983 vudeo game crash, the public really needed the fun injected back inot gaming and the word entertainment does that so very well. Also the NES abbreviation really caught on.

Nintendo Switch
A total move away from the Wii and WiiU names. Also Nintendo used the switch name well with it's "switch it up" ad campaign. Switch from portable to docked and back again in seconds. A great name. Also having the word Nintendo in there also further advertises the company.

Nintendo DS
A dual screen Nintendo. Explains exactly what it is. A very good name choice and it allowed the Nintendo 3DS to come after and have it's name also make sense.

Bad console names - in no particular order

Apple Pippin - Makes no sense at all. Also doesn't sound cool at all.

Nintendo Wii and Nintendo WiiU
Both terrible names as they don't really explain what the console is. What in hell is a Wii? Why is the console called a Wii? We know that Nintendo sold the Wii based on what ti was, not the name. The WiiU was an even worse name. We all know why that was by now. Yet another example of a console name not describing what the console is.

Xbox 1 and Xbox One X
What the? Is this the first Xbox? Why does One come after 360? Also why is the pro version of the One called X? If you didn't already know what these consoles are, the names of them all would totally confuse you.

Confusing console names that are not totally bad - in no particular order

Sega Master System and Sega Mega Drive
Individually they are alright console names but they are don't exist in isolation. Which one is the more modern system? Why is one master and one mega? I do think if you were not a Sega fan back in the day, differentiating the two consoles by name alone was hard.
 

Rubik

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Xbox One was a confusing and bland name. There's nothing redeeming about it.

At least the Wii and Wii U are bad names in a way that draws attention to the system. Both names probably fall under the "bad marketing is good marketing" sort of net in that people making fun of the name draws additional attention to the console.

Intellivision, ColecoVision, and TurboGrafx-16 are all also pretty bad names, in my opinion. A lot of the older console names are kind of silly.
 

Castle

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Intellivision, ColecoVision, and TurboGrafx-16 are all also pretty bad names, in my opinion. A lot of the older console names are kind of silly.
Those are very standard sounding tech product names for their time! :D But yeah, they are kinda cheesy sounding these days. Intelligent Vision and Turbo Graphics are kinda cool sounding, but just putting your company name in front of the word "vision" is rather schmaltzy.
 
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I think I mostly agree, except I like the NeoGeo name.. and I also think Game Gear was cool...

3DO was a pretty bad name IMO.

I also think Game Boy was kinda on the bad side... not cause of a gender thing... just because it's sorta plain and a bit lame.
 
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I guess I should add in the Zeebo.
What the . . . is a Zeebo. Well here's a picture of it.

YSDtpJi.jpg
 

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