Can People of the Opposite Sex Be 'just Friends'?

[Beauts]

Before I actually explain this a little, I just want to say that I intend this for a so called 'typical' dynamic e.g. straight boy and straight girl, although the same also applies to like gay guy + gay guy etc.

Basically, the question is obvious: do you think that people of the opposite sex can really just be friends?

I think they can. I have tonnes of male friends who I have no intentions with and I also doubt they have any intentions for me. You can have platonic relationships, right? However, I've been thinking about this because everytime I so much as blink at a member of the opposite sex, I get accused of flirting with them. This irritates me because as far as I am aware, I am not flirting with them at all, but having a normal conversation with what happens to be a guy.

I know people who really believe that males and females really can't have a straight-forward friendship and there always has to be an undercurrent- e.g. one likes the other, there is a history, or even just a physical attraction, however. So, I would like to know what everyone thinks here

 

[Azure Sage]

Of course they can. I'm a straight guy with a lot of friends who are straight girls, and I don't have any romantic feelings for them. I'm certain it's the same for them, too. And I'm totally fine with that. There's nothing wrong with it. It's natural. I don't know why some people think there needs to be sex involved, or think sex is bound to be involved. In some cases, yes, but not all of them. It's just as natural for men and women to be "friends with benefits" as it is for them to be "just friends".

 

[Princess Niki]

Yes, I have lots of really good friends at school that are both guys and girls.

 

[Zorth]

I think you could plot this on a graph, you got two factors here; how deep the friendship is (lol) and how attractive the persons are. Then you'd see the probability of something happening!

I'm willing to bet the apple I'm currently eating that if you have 2 very attractive people of the opposite sex that are just normal friends, they'll be banging each other really soon. However that most likely wouldn't be happening if the friendship between them was really good or one person wasn't attractive to the other. I myself have a female friend whom I've known for almost my entire life, who I consider almost like another sister to me.. so it's pretty obvious that I would never do anything with her even though she would perfectly fit the kind of girl (physically) I would get interested in.

So I think the type/quality of the friendship plays a significant part in whether or not you going to keep those natural feelings at bay!

 

[Justac00lguy]

Yes, of course they can, but the feeling has to be mutual of course. I have been in situations were it hasn't been mutual, either I actually liked the girl or it was the other way round, but that's of course if it's not mutual - if both parties like eachother as friends then sure they can just be friends.

I guess the reason why people see the problem is that it's the opposite gender, when really that shouldn't be a determining factor for friendship. The majority of my friends are male yes, but I have quite a lot of female friends too. Most of the time it's all just flirty banter, nothing goes to far, but at the end of the day we're only human and we can let our emotions get in the way of friendships.

So the answer is yes, but--well most of the time--if the feeling is mutual. In my experience if it isn't then it might end in the disaster, especially "staying" friends after a break-up but that's just me though, I know some people can stay friends after a proper relationship.

 

[CynicalSquid]

They can. Most of my friends are female and I only have feelings for one of them. I really don't understand why people think it's impossible. I almost never think about having a relationship with someone from the other gender when I become friend's with them. Maybe it's because I take relationships seriously. Maybe it's because I find it easier to talk to and relate to females more than I can with males. I just don't understand why people expect more than a friendship from ever person they meet from the opposite gender. That's probably why I don't get jealous that easily and I don't really like people who are the jealous type.

I also get annoyed when people accuse me of flirting and liking someone when I compliment a person of the opposite gender. I didn't know being nice was considered flirting. Most people don't give or have received genuine compliments though, so it makes sense. I guess that people aren't really nice to each other nowadays. I just like complimenting people. No matter what their gender is, people don't usually get enough compliments. I guess that's why I spoil people I love.

 

[Ventus]

I was about to say "yes, if the guy or girl is gay" but w/e. Anyway the answer is still yes, because you don't have to act on any romantic or sexual impulses.

 

[Dragoncat]

I'll say yes, I have a lot of male friends who I have no romantic feelings for. But it does kinda depend on the people in question. If they're both single, and they're both straight, there's a good chance that the friendship will go to the next level. Because it is better to be friends first, you already know their quirks and etc and you're more likely to work out problems if they arise.

As an example...I recently got back in touch with a guy who I was close friends with in school. Got a job and he's one of the supervisors. Kinda awkward having somebody your own age outranking you, but it is what it is. Now the thing is, I'm single and he's not. If we were both single? Idk...but I take it as he's meant to be just a friend, the world kinda works that way.

 

[Mudora]

In my opinion, guy and girls can definitely be just friends. I have many male friends who I do not have romantic feelings for, nor do they have romantic feelings towards me. Friendships can develop into something more, but they don't have to just because you're both of opposite sexes.

 

[Vanessa28]

I don't see any reason why they can't be friends. Yes they can and I have a lot of guy friends I'm very close to and there is no romantic feeling between us at all. And we are very good friends. So yes