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Can a relationship that started sexually last?

mαrkαsscoρ

Shadi Smith
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If a man and a woman met up for the first time and did something sexual during that time, and one of them wanted to pursue a relationship w/ that person afterwards, can it even last? I mean something like that is typically meant for a couple that's been in a relationship for a decent amount of time, or probably just one night stands. Can you really form a relationship out of that sort of foundation? I mean its basically strangers that barley know each other hooking up.
I know there's plenty of variables in this question to take into account, like if they've spoken to each other online or something. But just looking at it at face value, how likely is it that a relationship w/ that kind of foundation will hold up?
 

Satan

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I think the reason it's common that they don't normally last is because the type of people who usually jump into bed at the earliest chance don't really think long-term. But I mean, if you're committed to one another, I don't see why you couldn't strengthen the foundation of your relationship for it to last. But it really would depend on the people involved, their values, and their emotional maturity.

You also got to keep in mind that romantic and sexual attraction aren't always congruent, and a sexual partner may not fulfill someone's romantic needs or vise versa. If you start the relationship off physically, it might not be right away that you realize you aren't compatible, which will cause the relationship to fall apart.

So, yeah I think they can last but it's probably not as common for one reason or another.
 

Spiritual Mask Salesman

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It's hard to say. Really depends on capatibility. Oftentime relationships start out sexually anyway. One can go on one date and by the end of it they're having sex. Longevity of a relationship takes alot more than physical satisfaction though.
 

Deus

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Relationships don't often last anyway. I don't think whether it starts off sexually or not makes a big difference and if you start off having sex right away it has a good a chance as any. A pair of people aren't going to know each other very well after the first date so they could discover down the line they aren't compatible regardless of whether they had sex or not.
 

Beauts

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There’s no more reason it wouldn’t last than any other relationship. Just depends on the people involved. Sex is a big part of a relationship though so if you find out early that you’re compatible sexually it is a bonus. I’m sorry if that upsets people who still pretend that stuff doesn’t matter because it does. There are other factors to it of course, but there are people who wait til marriage to even kiss and end up divorced a year down the line. I object to whoever said about the “type of people who jump into bed” though. Why are you shaming people? Your personal choice is your personal choice but you have no business passing judgement on others for their relationships or sex lives when it has absolutely nothing to do with you.
 

Satan

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@Beauts I wasn't shaming people or passing judgement in saying "type of people"... How else wpuld I phrase what I was saying? Some people get physical right away, others don't. Ergo, the "type of people" who do get physical right away. Doesn't make them bad or wrong. I'm sorry if I came across as judgemental; I wasn't trying to be. :/ I maintain what I said though. A lot of people who do get physical early on aren't necessarily thinking long term, hence the term "one night stand." Which I only opened with because I was trying to assess why the question for whether a sexual relationship can last long-term is asked in the first place. I don't know what people think, but that was my guess as to why people question its longetivity as a foundation to a relationship. But that's not to say everyone who starts a relationship on sex is like that, as I also said in my post. There are also people who are in exclusively romantic relationships who aren't thinking long term either, so... yes it depends on the persons involved. I don't speak in absolutes so forgive me if my post is misleading somehow. I'll probably delete this later.
 

Ninja

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Just depends on the two people. It seems more often than not one night stands/tinder hookups are more common than blind dates or traditional courting.

It may seem shallow but for me, I definitely have to be physically/sexually attracted to someone before I would consider pursuing something with them. If we get to know each other and find that we are compatible, that’s a great bonus! I don’t like to play games or mess around, if I’m serious about someone, I think more long term as I don’t like my time being wasted.

All of my long term relationships have started off with physical attraction, and it grew deeper from there.
 

Misty

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I mean, I don't want to say never since that seems incorrect, but I would suspect it is rare that a relationship starts at a hook up and ends with commitment and long lasting commitment at that. I mean the list of hurdles it has seems somewhat more difficult to surmount. Again, not saying never, but if I were outside a casino in vegas betting, I wouldn't bet money on it working out.

I think perhaps because the intentions and habits don't really line up with commitment very well. I'm not saying you can't be someone who could commit (long term thinking) and be someone who hooks up (short term thinking), but the habits you've been developing don't really go very well with it and you haven't really spent life developing the same skills as someone who spent their time seeking commitment.

I almost see it like asking if someone who spent their life as like a scientific researcher could suddenly become a dramatic actor. Like, yes, that is absolutely a possibility...but to say their chance is as good as anyone's seems sort of like overly fluffy and heartwarming...but not very realistic. The patterns and habits we develop aren't easy to break out of and our decisions we make aren't a series of totally unrelated and non-impactful silliness.

The sort of person who ends up in a one night stand situation has character traits different than someone who never ends up in that situation. Traits that I'm not currently casting judgement on, except to say that they are not AS well suited to long term thinking and commitment. Just as say the person who spends most of their life pursuing long term romantic goals and commitment wouldn't be as well suited to hook-up culture or short term thinking.
 

Beauts

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@Beauts I wasn't shaming people or passing judgement in saying "type of people"... How else wpuld I phrase what I was saying? Some people get physical right away, others don't. Ergo, the "type of people" who do get physical right away. Doesn't make them bad or wrong. I'm sorry if I came across as judgemental; I wasn't trying to be. :/ I maintain what I said though. A lot of people who do get physical early on aren't necessarily thinking long term, hence the term "one night stand." Which I only opened with because I was trying to assess why the question for whether a sexual relationship can last long-term is asked in the first place. I don't know what people think, but that was my guess as to why people question its longetivity as a foundation to a relationship. But that's not to say everyone who starts a relationship on sex is like that, as I also said in my post. There are also people who are in exclusively romantic relationships who aren't thinking long term either, so... yes it depends on the persons involved. I don't speak in absolutes so forgive me if my post is misleading somehow. I'll probably delete this later.
I don’t think what I said was aimed at yo but if it was, I’m sorry if I misread it or took it the wrong way. I didn’t mean any offence.
 

mαrkαsscoρ

Shadi Smith
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I don’t think what I said was aimed at yo but if it was, I’m sorry if I misread it or took it the wrong way. I didn’t mean any offence.
I know I should just leave this be but

I think the reason it's common that they don't normally last is because the type of people who usually jump into bed at the earliest chance don't really think long-term.
I object to whoever said about the “type of people who jump into bed” though. Why are you shaming people? Your personal choice is your personal choice but you have no business passing judgement on others for their relationships or sex lives when it has absolutely nothing to do with you.
its easy to see why it looked like you were specifically calling him out but again, its neither here nor there
 

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