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A Bulbin's Diary

ShellShocker

adjective spaceman
Joined
Feb 2, 2009
Location
Australia
It's great how you linked everything together like when this Bulbin went with his leader and knocked out Link, like it happens in the game. Just remember to read over your writing after you finish it a few times and edit it to perfection to stop even a small amount of typos and I'm sure your writing will get even better. If it helps, you should read it out loud and get somebody else to read it too. This is because sometimes when you proof-read the text, it may sound great to you but another person may find it hard to understand. This happens to me from time to time.

Hope you take this advise and continue writing. Writing is a really fun activity for all ages.
 
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Disposable Hero

Guest
Its pretty good man, just some spelling errors that should be fixed, but not bad at all.
 

Gohma

Mmmmmmmmmh... BOMBS
Joined
Jun 14, 2009
Location
France -Normandy-
I like the part where he kills another Bulbin xD
Exactly what I could expect from a monster like this.

Great story btw, make more if you can :nod:
 

ironknuckle1

Archer Extraordinaire
Joined
Aug 31, 2009
Location
Fishing pond
I just posted another that ive been working on but not finished somewhere in this fan fiction section under carnival of time
 

Raven

Former Hylian Knight
Joined
Jun 8, 2009
Location
Halifax
your story is inspiration! you made some very good connections with the story line of the game, i think you could be a great writer if you keep practicing.

I am struggling with a story that i want to write and may put that on hold for a zelda fanfic, maybe i will do one about redeads!!! as it would give me some space to be creative and draw ideas from it for my own story.
 

Tak

Game Over
Joined
Nov 9, 2009
Location
Land of Shattered Hopes
This story is wonderful, i'd certainly like to see more like this.

It was great that you tied in all the details with the plot details of Twilight Princess, that helps to give the story more depth.

I'd recommend trying to extend your writings further, you could write an amazing story one day.

I'd also recommend reading over your story a few times, examine it thoroughly to see if it makes sense, and to weed out the spelling errors.

Overall, I rate your story an 8/10. Great, but several spelling errors let the story down.
 
Joined
Dec 14, 2008
Location
Louisiana, USA
I'll admit, a vast majority of fanfics turn me off just for the reason that they aren't linked to the main game that they're based on. Like, sequels to MM that never really happened you know? I just don't really find entertainment in that. But you really appealed to me in two ways: 1.) You kept it short. I don't like reading a long story on the computer to tell the truth, and 2.) You made plenty of references to the main game to keep me interested. I may be way too picky when it comes to this thing, and I may not appreciate the "finer" types of it, but I did like yours.
 

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