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"Courtney Love is the Voldemort of our lives. We shall never speak her name in this house." -dad

"Sometimes you need to take a dump 2 times in one day." - @Pendio

"We're gonna have to put all of our faith in Brazil" - @Pendio

"What is this, fly hell?" -my mom after swatting her second fly of the day

"Again, *****? You a hoe!" -a little girl talking to her sister on the way home from school in front of my house

"I'm the Day Devil!" "More like....the Gay Devil!!!" -two friends of mine making a scary movie when were 8 years old. Dug up the video tape earlier today. Made me die a little bit.

"He's just a grain of salt in the vast beach of life." -my mom talking about some stupid guy we know

"Why is there a bald man made out of gum in your fan fic" -my friend reading my fan fic on ZD, he's refering to this: uwu

"Hope they don't miss this ol' snake" -Snow Queen after being banned

"He's an atheist....thank God."

Has someone ever said something off the cuff that was just so hilarious or absurd? Post it here! Here are a few from people in my life: My parents on "The Legend of Zelda": "This game would be so much better if Link actually talked." -My dad "This is like a bad acid trip!" -My mom on...