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I set the hill on fire I claim you

(wouldn't being on a MOUNTAIN be better than being on a HILL?) Um... an awesome version of Photoshop is being sold at the foot of the hill for a cheap price, so you decide it's your opportunity to upgrade from GIMP. While you make your purchase, I claim the hill.

I eliminate all that makes no sense, including you. So, by instinct, I claim the hill. Makes sense, correct??

Umm...? Okayyy... I skydive out of my UFO, and well my alien technology can defy magic barriers. So, you not expecting an aerial attack, surrender. I claim the hill.

Your vampire-dragon attacks your face. I claim the hill...

I slap you with a soggy pancake; I claim the hill.

I levitate myself, wielding my extremely massive glowing purple sword. I release a spin attack, knocking you backward, and you falling off the hill. I claim the hill.

Cucco Power's elephant helps flatten the hill as it lands on FirevsIce. I claim the... mesa or plateau, or whatever it is.

Again, since there is no such thing as a "50 ton weight" I don't die. I drop a fifty-tonne weight on you. ;P I claim the hill. (As far as I'm concerned, if I continue finding mistakes in your plans, I don't have to come up with anything. :P)

Since there is no such thing as a "tazar", according to your spelling, I tase you with my very own taser gun. And since you forgot to do so, I claim the hill.

I throw a rabbit plushie at you. You fall off. Simply, I claim the hill.

A massive glacier flattens the hill (and FierceDeity) and is now a plain... I claim the plain!

Eh? Did this thread get corrupted with random confusion? What did I miss? Umm... the Big Bad Wolf blows your castle off of the hill... I claim the Hill!

I eat you, assuming you are made of marshmallows (you are powerful, right?) I claim the hill!

Justin Bieber appears out of nowhere and starts singing "Baby", his high-pitched voice shattering your ears. Running to get them put back together, I claim the hill.

I butcher Makar into pieces of mulch; while you weep over him, I claim the hill!

Tailpasarins grab you and pull you backwards, down the hill, while depleting your magic meter. I claim the hill!

I weaken you by creeping you out with my extreme obsession with the King of Evil. I finish you off from there and then claim the hill. I claim the hill.

Wario sits on you; I claim the Hil!

The moon falls on you... I claim the Hill!

A wall master grabs you and places you at the foot of the hill (entrance). I claim the hill!

A mothula covers you in morths; you loose your balance and fall off the hill. I claim the hill!

The Helmaroc King picks you up and tosses you into the ocean (familiar?) I claim the hill.

(I can't get ninja'd on this thread because it will always work) I summon a tidal wave that sweeps you off your feet. I claim the hill!